Living the Could Life

Deeper Dive into Budgeting Your Travel

Robert and Theresa — Tue, 20 Oct 2026 08:00:22 +0000

Part 2 - Travel budgeting Italy: maximize energy and enjoyment with disability

Last time we mentioned several trip tips to help you maximize your money and your energy. When one is out of whack, the other is affected. Take time before your trip to consider what is really meaningful to you.

If you want to do something different than the typical tourist, go for it. You may have a special interest or a dream. It's entirely yours. We mention taking a gondola ride in Venice. Maximizing energy is especially important when a disability wants to challenge you.

Ahhhhhhhhh - Doesn't the Gondola Ride look Dreamy?

Your best trip remains one that brings happiness because you planned it from the start. Personalizing it makes it unforgettable. If there are glitches - and with travel, you should expect that - you have a Plan B.

Counting Spoons

Keep your energy in mind. Below you will find the episode on Spoon Theory. Keep that in mind during your travels.

Shout Out Again to Italy

We used Italy as an example for budgeting. We will continue using Italy as our example destination again the next time. It gets us excited about visiting. But, it is also preparing us to take our own advice.

Living The Could Life contains affiliate links. They don’t cost you anything, but we may earn a small commission if you use them. We may have been hosted on a trip, excursion or other travel-related event. We may have received or experienced a product for review. Any opinion is our own. AS AN AMAZON ASSOCIATE I EARN FROM QUALIFYING PURCHASES

AS AN AMAZON ASSOCIATE I EARN FROM QUALIFYING PURCHASES.

Transcript

Click Here for Transcript Theresa: Robert: (Transcribed by TurboScribe. Go Unlimited to remove this message.) Robert: Welcome back to Living the Good Life. Real travel for real bodies. If your body changed before you were ready, but you still want to see the world, this is the place for you. We talk accessibility, mobility, energy, and joy. Because traveling isn't over. It's just different. There's still so much travel you could do. I'm Robert. Theresa: And I'm Theresa. Today we're diving into episode 2 of our Italy planning series. That's how to use the perfect trip tips that we shared the last time. Robert: We're talking points, mobility equipment, spoon-based itineraries, and how to make smart choices when you don't have unlimited money or unlimited spoons. Theresa: Because, remember our guiding principle, if saving the money doesn't make your trip better, it isn't really a savings. Robert: Let's start with points, because they can make Italy dramatically more affordable, even if you're starting late. Theresa: And you don't need to have a wallet full of cards, and I know some people have more cards than I could ever imagine having. So just start with one. And find one, especially if you travel abroad, like to Italy, that has no foreign transaction fees. Those can add up. It has a simple earning structure, and a good sign-up bonus, and easy redemption options, and I know I started with a lower cost credit card affiliated with the airline just because the luggage charges are now frightening. They can be 50 bucks or more each way for a check back. Robert: Most people think points come from flying. Nope. You earn them from groceries, prescriptions, gas, streaming services, utility bills, online shopping portal. Theresa: Oh, and I want to talk about online shopping portals, because that's something I often forget. And you can shop through those and earn miles. And these can be things that you always buy from companies you always use. Robert: Use points for flights, hotels, upgrades, airport lounges. Avoid redeeming for gift cards, merchandise, cashback conversions. Theresa: Remember that you can protect your spoons with points. So points aren't just about saving money. They can also be used to save spoons. For example, maybe you can find a non-stop flight or one without a lot of connections. Again, like we said in the past episode, if you fly from a small airport, you may not have too many non-stop flight options. Maybe you'd like a hotel closer to the city, a hotel that has an elevator, or even upgrading to business or first class for your comfort. Robert: That's the travel advisor rule again. Spend where it protects your body, save where it doesn't cost joy. Theresa: And let's talk about mobility equipment, because having the right gear can make or break your trip. You know, be realistic about what you take. Don't say, oh, I don't think I need my walker or my cane or a wheelchair. I mean, you may even decide to rent a wheelchair at the destination. But you can buy used mobility equipment. There's national online marketplaces, including Mobility Market USA, the Mobility Exchange, and by SellWheelchairs.com. And of course, look locally as well. Those kind of sites, especially for local where you can check the equipment, they let you buy used scooters, lightweight wheelchairs, travel-friendly walkers. They let you compare prices and read owner reviews. I mean, also look at estate sales. Robert: Italy has rental companies in major cities like Rome, Florence, and Milan. Renting can be cheaper than flying with heavy equipment. Theresa: Less stressful as well. Uses fewer of your spoons. Don't have to worry about the airline damaging your equipment or it getting lost or left or not working. So remember to choose the right equipment that you need. Italy, well, has a lot of old cities, so there's cobblestones, hills, uneven terrain. Be sure your scooter has good battery life or you have a backup. A wheelchair with sturdy wheels, a walker with strong brakes, or in a cane with a traction tip and good shoes. Robert: And always bring extra cane tips, a backup mobility aid, a small repair kit, and a printed accessibility note in Italian. Theresa: And that is the accessibility note is also good for admissions into some attractions. They have like an open-to-all policy in many countries in Europe. So in my case, I'm getting a note from my doctor because the note's not only helpful for people with disabilities but also with impairments. And in my case, even though, you know, I can't drive or do much by myself, I have an impairment, not a disability. So I am bringing along a note from my doctor because that allows me to have my sea night guy come along with me. I mean, we're going to a lot of castles. I don't always get to see much of them, but I still pay admission. So this letter from the doctor will help immensely. Besides that note, and that also helps reduce fatigue and spending. If you, um, using your mobility aids might prevent you from having to splurge on an expensive taxi because it's unnecessary when you have the right equipment. Robert: Now let's build your itinerary around spoons, not around seeing everything. Theresa: And yeah, we all like to see everything because we never know when we'll get back to a place. But consider choosing one dream moment. It can be your anchor, your North Star, the perfect trip moment for you. For example, maybe you want to see the Sistine Chapel, or you want to eat gelato during sunset in Florence, or ride a gondola in Venice, or visiting a vineyard and sampling wine in Tuscany. Everything else supports this moment. Robert: And you want to build recovery days. Every two, three days schedule a low spoon day. And that could include things like cafe sitting, neighborhood wandering, light shopping, scenic viewpoints, slow meals. Theresa: And that's really critical, I think, because if you put several high spoon days in a row, you may need a lot of low spoon days to recover. So use the 3-2-1 rule. For every three high spoon activities, add two medium spoon activities and a low spoon day. Robert: So plan your meals around energy. High spoon days equal predictable meals. Low spoon days equal exploring, wandering, trying new things. Theresa: And avoid false savings. Again, if the results don't make you happy, don't do it. So don't choose a cheaper, and these are examples because you, of course, have the final decision. Don't choose a cheaper hotel that is far from transit. I mean, that works if you have a car or a long train route with stations that have stairs, but I will say the train stations in Italy are fairly accessible. Don't do a budget tour that is not accessible. And try to avoid early morning flights if it takes you a long time to get ready. But remember, if you take the first flight out, if there are any problems, usually you have other options in case of delays or cancellations. Whereas if you take the latest flight and it gets canceled, you usually have to stay an extra day. So any of these situations cost spoons, and spoons cost money. Robert: Okay, now let's revisit the downloadable list and talk about how to use it. Number one, choose your dream moment. Build your budget around it. Number two, protect your body. Spend money where it reduces fatigue. Number three, save where it doesn't cost joy. Use trains, markets, apartment hotels. Number four, build a fatigue buffer. Add 10 to 15% to your budget for tired day spending. Number five, use your points strategically. Upgrade for comfort, reduce stress. Number six, use mobility marketplaces. Buy or rent equipment that supports your body. Number seven, plan meals around spoons. Predictable meals on high spoon days. Number eight, book accessible rooms early. They always sell out first. Theresa: So let's look at a real world example. We will kind of base this on our upcoming trip to Italy. Robert: Here's a dream moment. A sunset gondola ride in Venice. Theresa: That's something a lot of people want to do. Also, a lot of people say, oh, that's just a touristy thing. So take anything that's considered a touristy thing with a grain of salt. If it's a tourist scam, that's one thing. But if it's popular with tourists, that might be because there's something interesting or good about it, something that attracts people to that destination, monument, museum, restaurant, whatever. It's all what you find beneficial, or it's, you know, on a bucket list, or you've always dreamed of doing. So like in the case of taking a Vaporetto in Venice, do a little bit of planning ahead. So to support both your monetary and spoon budget, maybe look for a hotel that's near a Vaporetto. So if you want to do the gondola, the Vaporetto will take you to the gondola station. You could also find a hotel that's near a place to get the gondola, and maybe book in advance, see if there's any packages, check Venice Tourism for, you know, any specific package tours that might be helpful. And then maybe after that, you would like a nice, relaxed, predictable dinner. And then the next day, have a slow morning and don't rush it. Robert: Your points can cover a nonstop flight, a hotel upgrade, lounge access for mobility comfort. Theresa: Exactly. And that hotel upgrade might be the one that maybe overlooks the canal. So you can't, instead of just doing your own gondola excursion, you can watch others. So another, so you also want to look at mobility equipment. Again, in the example of the gondola, see what's available. If you have a wheelchair, a walker, or some other assistive aid, but you'll want a lightweight wheelchair, a cane, and maybe a backup cane, extra tips for the cane, and a repair kit for your wheelchair, scooter, walker, or whatever you're taking with you. Robert: And remember the spoon-based itinerary. Three high-spoon days, two medium-spoon days, one low-spoon day. Repeat. Theresa: And again, the hotel upgrade could be an apartment, and having a spoken hub itinerary can help with your spoon budget. It's all up to you, whatever makes you feel most comfortable. Thanks for joining us and listening to episode two. Remember, your perfect trip doesn't require unlimited money or unlimited spoons. It just requires thoughtful choices that protect your body and your joy. Robert: And your downloadable perfect trip tips are waiting for you. Use them to build the idly adventure your body can comfortably enjoy. Theresa: Arrivederci! Robert: free audio post-production biophonic.com (Transcribed by TurboScribe. Go Unlimited to remove this message.)

Show Notes

Music

Links to Referenced Resources

Perfect Trip Tips Download

Point-Earning Strategies

Samples of Workbook Spaces

Your 70-Day Workbook Space Quick Setup Guide

Living The Could Life - A 70-Day Workbook For Living Well After Body Change

Budget Your Travel

Robert and Theresa — Tue, 13 Oct 2026 12:16:42 +0000

Part 1 - Plan Your Best Trip on Your Budget

Your best trip happens when you stick to your budget. In this episode we explore some of the hidden costs to travel. But, we also offer some helpful tips and considerations.

Is Your Budget Just About Money?

As big fans of the Spoon Theory, we must advise that your energy is a big part of your budget. It actually affects your budget immensely. Low energy can definitely increase your budget.

Take a listen to this and the next few episodes to learn more about budgeting for travel. Below, you will find a worksheet with a list of things to consider. There are some hidden items and events that you should be aware of when planning your budget. It's always wise to add some comfort funds.

Never forget that what may seem like savings, may come with a price in time or energy.

Shout Out to Italy

We used Italy as an example for budgeting, However, you can use the same techniques for any destination. Remember, it's your trip!

AS AN AMAZON ASSOCIATE I EARN FROM QUALIFYING PURCHASES.

Transcript

Click Here for Transcript Theresa: Welcome back to Living the Could Life. Real travel for real bodies. If your body changed before you were ready, but you still want to see the world, this is the place for you. We talk accessibility, mobility, energy, and joy, because traveling isn't over. It's just different. There's still so much travel you can do. I'm Robert. Theresa: And I'm Theresa. Today we're diving into a topic that so many people ask about. How to budget a trip? And we're letting you follow along with an upcoming trip to Italy that we're planning. But how do you budget it, especially when you're navigating later-in-life disabilities? Theresa: We're talking hidden costs, spoon theory as a budgeting tool, essential documents, all the money-saving strategies that make travel doable, joyful, and sustainable. Theresa: So let's start at the very beginning. That's with planning, because budgeting doesn't necessarily start with just money. It starts with information. Theresa: Before you spend a dollar, you need your documents in order. For Italy, the basics are passport, travel insurance, and we'll talk about why this is crucial, medical summary from your doctor, medication list with generic names, copies of prescriptions, emergency contacts, accessibility documentation, if you use mobility aids or need assistance, credit card travel notices, and backup digital copies stored in your phone and Theresa: another thing I like to add to that list, or should have added, are apps that you can use in planning, like to the Italy government, to see what they need. There is a new document that they've been trying to implement in the EU, but you should be safe at least until the end of this year. You won't need to have that document. It's pretty much a verification. So I do want to emphasize that documents aren't just for emergencies. We kind of go by the saying, if you pack it, you hopefully don't need it, but don't go without it. So one thing is airport assistance, and usually you can request that when you're booking a ticket, and that's not only mobility assistance, but also for those with hearing or visual problems, and if you have any dietary needs. If you're seated or flying with an airline that actually gives you any kind of food or food service on the flight, there's hotel accessibility requests. Often there are a few accessible rooms in a lodging place. And then you may have to visit a pharmacy, so have your prescription. You may need to have any of your mobility aids repaired. You may want to have a copy of your insurance with you to file claims, or at least to get in touch with them to see if something's covered, or how to go through a procedure to be sure it's covered. So all of that reduces stress, which comes to your budgeting of spoons. It's just as important as budgeting money, maybe even more so. Theresa: Exactly. And speaking of spoons, let's bring spoon theory into the planning phase. Theresa: We've talked about spoon theory a lot until doing this podcast. Neither of us had ever heard of it, but now we talk about our spoons all the time. So your spoon energy is not just about your energy, but it does figure into your financial planning, because high spoon days often cost more money. Theresa: Travel days, high spoons. Use-in days, medium to high spoons. Rest days, low spoons, and usually low cost. Theresa: And remember, we are kind of generalizing here. Everybody has their own spoon spending, so just because one person spends so many spoons on one activity, maybe that's not the case for you. You know yourself better than anybody. When you're budgeting, think of how spoons and dollars are connected. For example, high spoon days, you might eat a taxi, your mobility aids, or pre-booked tours or other arrangements. Low spoon days could be neighborhood walks, cafes, or simple meals. And a medium spoon day could be flexible, independent sightseeing, or short excursions. Theresa: This helps you avoid overscheduling and overspending. Build-in recovery days. They're good for your body and your wallet. Theresa: And remember, budgeting spoons means budgeting time. Rushing costs money. Slow travel saves it. Theresa: Let's talk about the hidden costs people don't plan for, especially travelers with latent life disabilities. Number one, mobility aid fees, wheelchair batteries, repairs abroad, replacement parts, airline damage, where insurance can help. Number two, accessible transportation, taxis instead of buses, private transfers, accessible trains or ferries. Number three, medical needs, extra medication, over-the- counter items, compression socks, hydration packets, airport medical assistance. Usually free tipping is customary. Number four, food and hydration, buying water frequently, needing predictable meals, paying more for seating comfort. Theresa: Number five, that's fatigue costs. And that's a big one. When you are tired, you spend more. You grab the nearest restaurant, the nearest taxi, the nearest or the quickest anything, no matter the cost. Theresa: And budgeting for fatigue means planning. Rest blocks, easy meal options, nearby cafes, accessible routes, backup plans. Theresa: And insurance is a non-negotiable. It's not a luxury. It's really a budget protector. And I know some people say, and I know all of us now who are listening to this, or a lot of us might have some kind of disability or health condition. But even if you get along perfectly well or you're young, you don't say, well, I'm young, I'm healthy, because on the way to the airport or strolling around in Rome, you could trip and fall and break an arm. And that doesn't matter what age you are. So be sure to get insurance and watch for the gaps. Check on pre-existing coverage, mobility aid coverage, emergency evacuation, and that's a big one, and there's a huge cost if you need to be evacuated, and then trip interruption or delay. So there's a travel advisor role, and I learned this when I did a stint as a travel advisor. Not all of the savings are worth it, especially if you're on a once-in-a-lifetime trip. You want to save 10 bucks to skip something important that means a lot to you, or to take transportation that requires a lot of transfers. Time is money, so spending more money to get to a place quicker or to have fewer transfers is worth it. So if the saving money doesn't make your trip better, it's not really savings. And for late-in-life travelers, this is everything you could be doing a once-in-a-lifetime trip, and budget is still a consideration. Theresa: A cheaper hotel up a steep hill? Not really a savings. A long train route with stairs and transfers? Not savings. A 6 a.m. flight with three connections? Definitely not savings. Theresa: KIDD And for people like us who live four hours or more from a major airport, driving that distance to save 50 or 100 bucks, especially with the cost of gas, and then having to pay for parking, is not necessarily savings, and you can't predict traffic. We always are, I'll say 90% of the time, have to make a connection in a hub. So for us, we're used to it, but we do not like to find flights that are 18 hours long because they're $50 less, or you may have three connections or 10-hour layovers. It's not worth it. So you really have to evaluate that. But if you have a perfect trip, you also need to protect your spoons, which means protecting your comfort, means protecting your comfort and your joy. Theresa: Now let's talk about saving money, because Italy doesn't have to break the bank. Theresa: Nor does any place you travel to. You may just need to adjust how long you stay there, where you stay, having a home base. It's all what matters to you, what's important, and what maintains your energy. So one tip is to travel off-season, which we really enjoy. Part of it, there's fewer crowds, and like in my case, because I don't see well, crowds are really difficult for me. So in places in, I'll say, the northern hemisphere, October to April can be very budget-friendly. There's fewer crowds, the weather can be cooler, and the prices can be lower. Shorter season is also good, and again in the northern hemisphere, because the southern is just the opposite. So late September, early October, late April and May are still good times to travel, and we even have done it in December and January. But we're used to cooler weather and snow, and it didn't bother us at all. Another tip is to use credit card points and frequent flyer miles. Theresa: If you're late to the points game, don't worry. You can still use a travel card with no foreign transaction fees. You can earn points on groceries and prescriptions, you can redeem for flights or hotels, use companion passes, use airline shopping portals for extra miles. Theresa: And one thing that I think is really good is if you get even the basic credit card, you can save money on your luggage fees, because they're getting out of control these days. One round trip can almost pay for the credit card fee. Another tip is to book early, and remember accessible rooms are limited, so they can go early and go fast. We especially enjoy apartment hotels. We do a hub and spoke type of travel, usually and just do day trips. You know there are transportation costs for that as well. So that's something to consider, you know, if you're paying excessive train fares or paying a lot for gasoline, you need to either move or figure out something else. We like kitchens because we can store food, we can cook our food, we can reheat food. We have plenty of space for mobility aids, and I like to have a place to sit down. Does anybody really want to spend any more than, I think, 15 minutes having to sit on a bed and the one desk chair that's there? And there can be laundry access, which is helpful for us because then we can travel with less luggage. The environment is usually more quiet. You don't have to listen to slamming doors like you might in a large hotel. And then we do try to use public transportation. In Italy, again, the trains are affordable, comfortable, mobility friendly, and easy to navigate. They are accessible. For medical needs, be sure you have extra medication because people don't always know what it is in another country or it has a different name. That might be difficult to get. Over-the-counter items, bring those with you. They can cost a lot abroad. Compression socks are always something good to wear. Buy those at home before you leave. You may need hydration packets. You might want to pre-arrange, and that's also when you book your ticket, medical assistance. It's always been free, but we always leave a tip. Theresa: Another money-saving strategy is to look for free or low-cost activities. Visiting piazzas, churches, markets, neighborhood walks, scenic overlooks, public gardens. Theresa: Those are all perfect places for people watching to get a real sense of the place you're visiting. So Italy's amazing for budget. There's panini shops, aperitivo hours, like happy hour, and be sure you check on hours of opening at certain places because Italy's siesta is called a riposo. So, you know, shops close, restaurants close, so basically like lunch times 12.30 to 2.30 or 3-ish. They also have bakery, breakfast, house wines save money, there's street markets, and local grocery stores that have, you know, salads and fruit or something quick. And then you can also save money or at least get a space by pre-booking trains, tours, museums, and maybe airport transfers. Theresa: Okay, let's outline a sample budget for a 10-day Italy trip. Theresa: So flights will be a huge part of your budget. I like to track flights. There are flight trackers. If you follow points, there's different clubs you can join or newsletters that can say, hey there's a flight to Rome that's only so many points, you can jump on that. But otherwise, especially now with the cost of fuel, flights are crazy. So if you see a good deal, jump on it. I think our flight, which I found on Delta, they had a points special. I think we paid $60, which I'm happy with. The flight jumps all around. I've seen it as high as $2,000. So watch your flights. Lodging, I would say off-season and especially for a hotel, be on the lower end. And it depends on the hotel you want. If this is a once-in-a-life trip, don't just go for the least expensive hotel. And they would probably run you about, I'd say $80 to $200 or $90 in the off-season and a tad more in the shorter season and a lot more in the high season. And depend on what you eat. If you enjoy trying food, you could eat out three meals a day. So your budget will be different from somebody like us, who often do like a late lunch, early dinner, which will be harder in Italy because of opening times. But again, we have an apartment where we could cook or get carryout. Most of the restaurants have menus. So you could check that before leaving. And transportation, if you're just staying in a base, you may just enjoy staying in that city. But if you're going out for day trips, that's an additional cost to consider. And then consider museum admissions. And if you go to a concert, things like that for your budget. Always allow a buffer for medical inaccessibility. Maybe the weather's bad and you decide on a taxi or you hurt yourself and you have to get a knee brace or something like that. Of course, have insurance, which you will have bought before going on the trip. For your spoons, be sure to add a fatigue buffer. Maybe it's 10 to 15 percent of your budget as well. Like, I want to get back to the hotel right now. So just grab the nearest cab. Theresa: So your Italy budget isn't just numbers. It's your spoons, your mobility needs, your comfort, your pace, your backup plans, and your energy. Theresa: Budgeting truly is self-advocacy. You're saying to yourself, I deserve a trip that fits my body, my needs, and my desires. And I want something that I am happy and satisfied with. Theresa: And Italy is one of the best places to do that. Accessible, beautiful, delicious, and full of gentle experiences. We've created a downloadable list for listeners. Perfect Trip Tips. How to plan Italy with limited spoons and limited funds. Theresa: What you will find on that list, which you will again find in the show notes. Some of the tips, and these are downloadable. You can do whatever you want with them. Choose one dream moment and budget around that. Spend money where it protects your body and save money where it doesn't cost any pleasure. Build in recovery days. They save both spoons and money. Book accessible rooms early. Use points when you can for flights and hotels. Travel off-season or the shoulder season. Beware though, in Europe, August is when almost everything closes up. So it may be more difficult doing what you were hoping to do. Bring a medical summary and a medication list. Choose apartment hotels for comfort and savings. Use trains or public transport instead of taxis when possible. Pack your mobility aids wisely. That includes backups. Use a dedicated online marketplace for finding used equipment. Create a fatigue buffer into your budget. Plan meals around energy levels, and don't chase every site. And that's hard for those of us with FOMO, but it can really save on your spoon usage. So order them according to how important it is to you. Theresa: Episode 2 will teach you how to use these tips, including how to get into the points game, how to find used mobility equipment, and how to build a spoon-based itinerary. Theresa: Thanks for joining Living the Good Life today. If you're planning a trip to Italy or anywhere else for that matter, remember, your body is your compass. Budget for it, honor it, and let it guide you. Theresa: We'll be back next week with more real-world travel tips for real bodies. Theresa: Until then, take care of your And I'd say ciao for now, but I have been reading up and ciao is not just a casual word. It's really used for people you know, but I'll use it here because we're getting to know all of our listeners. See you next time. Theresa: (Transcribed by TurboScribe.

Show Notes

Music

Links to Referenced Resources

Perfect Trip Tips Download

Samples of Workbook Spaces

Your 70-Day Workbook Space Quick Setup Guide

Living The Could Life - A 70-Day Workbook For Living Well After Body Change

Your Travel Mini-Kitchen Saves The Day

Robert and Theresa — Tue, 29 Sep 2026 14:13:57 +0000

Should You Travel With a Mini-Kitchen?

Traveling with dietary issues requires special planning. One thing to consider is a mini-kitchen. Especially when you need food to maintain a healthy dietary condition, consider packing a few mini-kitchen items.

What should my travel mini-kitchen include?

For those with dietary needs, restrictions and issues, the importance of this add-on is significant. Are you always scrambling to find products and equipment to make your life easier. In this episode, we discuss some of the items that you might need to ease your travel with a mini-kitchen.

However, what you add to your person mini-kitchen is up to you. You can make it as big or small as you like. After all, the reason to travel with a mini-kitchen is to customize it to your personal needs.

AS AN AMAZON ASSOCIATE I EARN FROM QUALIFYING PURCHASES.

Transcript

Click Here for Transcript Welcome back to Living the Could Life. Today, we're going to talk a little bit more about traveling with the food that you may need for your health conditions or for your nourishment when you travel. I'm Teresa.

Traveling With Dietary Issues

Robert and Theresa — Tue, 22 Sep 2026 17:39:59 +0000

How to prepare for traveling with Dietary Issues

Traveling with dietary issues may discourage some from traveling at all. Fortunately, there are many ways to plan ahead if you have dietary issues, a problem that some find embarrassing, limiting and depressing

But, there is hope in the travel world for those willing to make some changes in how they are traveling with dietary issues. In this episode, we offer several suggestions. As with any type of body disruptors, changes need to be made. If you are willing to make the effort, you may benefit from some of the suggestions that we have made. Fortunately, you will be able to prepare yourself for traveling with dietary issues

Check the show notes for a free downloadable printout to help you plan yourself for traveling with dietary issues. Happy Travels.

AS AN AMAZON ASSOCIATE I EARN FROM QUALIFYING PURCHASES.

Transcript

Click Here for Transcript Welcome to Living the Qud Life. Today, we're going to talk about traveling with dietary issues, and those can be chronic issues or random acute issues. It can be allergies, it can be digestive issues, it could be things like Crohn's, or it could just be that your system doesn't like certain things. So we want to treat food just as we would any other logistics for travel. So you'll need to plan ahead, pack intentionally, research your destination's food landscape, and have a reliable backup system. This will reduce stress, prevent emergencies, and keep you nourished even when options are limited. We're planning a trip to northern Italy in a few months, and I have started transitioning to a strict vegan diet, and I'm a little concerned about how I'm going to be able to maintain that diet. And I'm also thinking about how other people, when they're traveling, might have very restrictive diets and how that's going to work. Right, and that's something you can't just wait until you get to Italy to think about. I mean, things are different there. And already, I like to have a place, especially when we base ourself in a hub and are in a place for several days, to have kitchen access. And that's especially good when you are following a certain diet. And if you need to take certain medications that need to be refrigerated, maybe, like for me, tea makes everything better, so having a kettle is good, having a microwave is good, especially if you don't want to go out a lot, or if you have certain favorites that you like to cook no matter where you go. Some of those may not be available locally, and you can do your research before. I'm working on a book about using AI to plan travel, and for our upcoming Italy trip, we are using that to find out where we can find certain things. And I think we're going to Parma, and I think that will be a real challenge for Robert. I will follow along with his diet, but there's like cheese and prosciutto, so we may have to eat separately. That kind of brings us to the core questions that are going to shape our entire food plan and sort of general food plan for anyone who's traveling with dietary issues, concerns. And the first question is, will you have kitchen access? Will you have a fridge, a microwave, a kettle, or even a full kitchen? And this is going to determine how much you need to pack and prep. And some things you do automatically if you're used to it, but especially when you travel abroad, you don't know exactly where you might find gluten-free, low sugar, no sugar, no oil, dairy-free. I mean, if you have lactose intolerance, will that be in the refrigerator at the local supermarket like it is at home, or do you have to go to a separate store to find things like that? So it's just good to plan. And then one thing that I think both of us have learned is that you can only take care of yourself. Nobody's going to take care of you, so don't assume that, oh, we'll just go to Italy and we'll find what we need. We can find stuff to eat on the plane. Don't do that. If you need certain foods, say you have hypoglycemia, you have to eat regularly, don't count on getting food on the airplane. You know there are times, oh, we ran out of a certain meal or they forgot to load something to the cart. So be responsible for yourself and always have your little emergency snacks or medications with you. And I've been thinking about that. I'm going to order a vegan meal for the plane trip across and then coming back also. So I'll see how that works. That's the first time I'll have done that. Some destinations can be extremely accommodating. Italy has a gluten-free awareness, so I'm going to be interested in that. I'm not gluten-free, but I'm just curious to how they're approaching that. And then there's other things too you need to think about. If you have allergies, and you know some people can say, oh yeah, this is gluten-free or this hasn't been mixed with nuts or any other contaminants that may upset your system, you do need to carry your own EpiPens, antihistamines, and you know some people wear the bracelets, especially traveling abroad. Take all of your medications in their original packaging. If you are going to bring some food with you, you need to be aware that some countries do restrict meat, dairy, and fresh produce. So you need to check the rules before packing any of those items. It's just always good to have backup supplies. I remember one time we were taking the train from Seattle to Portland, and the train just died. And even though the train was kind of dying along the way, nobody thought about having buses ready to meet us along the route. And one thing that was really interesting was they had provisions on board the train that were designed for just this kind of emergency. However, their food provisions had expired two years earlier. Right. So some of the things, you know, it's not like it was refrigerated food, but maybe starving could be a better option than eating the expired food. And, you know, nobody showed up with like, oh, you guys haven't had it. It was also very hot in the train and nobody showed up with water or anything like that. So you really need to plan for those worst case scenarios, delays, closures, limited stock. And an important thing is to build redundancy into your food plan. Exactly. I go in with the attitude that really nobody cares about me, so I need to take care of myself and plan for the extra snack or the extra water, extra food or whatever it is. So what you need to do is, or a recommendation, you don't need to do anything that we say, but in the first 24 hours, think about what you will need then when you arrive in a new destination, what you need for daily staples or emergency backups and medical essentials. So this is going to be packing and you need to think about this in layers. So packing in layers and packing for your first 24 hours is what Teresa is talking about. Take things like, I guess, those provisions on the train, like things that are stable and don't expire or haven't expired. So maybe like nuts, dried fruits, granola bars, maybe candy, sturdy vegetables like pre-washed apples, carrots. And again, just be careful when you arrive in a different country, they may not allow produce. Right. And then maybe have some meal replacement. Like Ensure, like the milkshakes or those shakes, but you may not be able to travel with those in your carry-on luggage, right, because they're large. Correct. Although they are medically necessary, I wouldn't trust it. Traveling with kids, you know, they also have dietary considerations, you need to take care of, so be sure you pack and are prepared for them. And then you also need to think about further along in the trip, you need to pack smart staples. And those are things that will travel well and fill nutritional gaps. Things like rice crackers, dried soups, boxed beans, microwavable grains like oatmeal, rice, shelf stable proteins, tuna packets, jerky, shelf stable tofu, specialty items that sometimes are hard to find, gluten-free bread, dairy-free snacks. Just be sure if you have any perishables, you pack those safely. You might consider vacuum sealing proteins, taking things that last longer, like yogurts, fruit or cooked meals. Use insulated bags or ice packs while you're traveling. And depending upon where you're going to stay in your hotel rooms, if you don't have, if you don't have a kitchen available, you could sort of build your own mini kitchen. You could take travel size oil, vinegar, spice blends, collapsible containers, mason jars, maybe a small knife and a cutting board, tiny can opener, sporks. But watch out, you know, with the small knife, don't put it in your carry-on. If you don't have a room with a kitchen, and even if you do, you might want to wait to buy things like oil and vinegar. Besides foods and a mini kitchen, be sure you have your medical and communication essentials with you. Everybody doesn't know what your needs are or what you may be allergic to, so maybe you want to take two EpiPens and keep those in a carry-on, not in your truck luggage because they'd be useless. Allergy translation cards in the local language and a printed allergy plan. Like I said, some people do wear the bracelets. Then carry along things like hand sanitizer. And disinfectant wipes. And disinfectant wipes because you know how well they clean planes. You'll want to research your food options at your destination. This will help reduce uncertainty and build confidence. You can look at what the local cuisine will entail and find out what ingredients are common, are hidden, maybe unavoidable. For example, in Japan, they use seafood in many different broths. And like we said before, Italy is becoming highly gluten aware. And that's something I'm also looking forward to trying, to see just, you know, what the difference in taste is. And even though I don't need to watch out for gluten, it's just nice to know what kind of substitute that is. And especially when it comes to your digestive system or your health. The last thing you want to be is sick or spending hours in your hotel room or in the bathroom. And that is another thing to check on. If you have digestive issues of any kind, search out where there are toilets. There is an app, and I can't remember what the name is. I'll look it up and put it in the show notes. But there are other apps too. So if you're looking for vegan, vegetarian options, and this is a worldwide spotter, it's Happy Cow. There's Allergy Eats for allergy-friendly restaurants. Find Me Gluten Free is a global gluten-free dining app. And then there's another that can scan packaged foods for allergens. That one is called Content Checked. And then be sure you use translation tools too. When we were in Europe, the nutrition labeling was quite different from ours. And I was quite impressed with the EU program in which they were labeling foods from giving it a grade A down to a grade E, I think it was, on how often you should eat it and how healthy and nutritional it is. I think they say how much energy you get out of it, which actually means how many calories. And I want to say they use kilocalories or joules, different than us. [Speaker 2] Do you remember? [Speaker 1] I don't, but I remember it was quite different from how we had organized our nutrition labels. Right. It's very different. And then one thing to be sure is like a translation app is really good. Like there's Google Translate and there's others. And you can get pre-written dietary cards at celiactravel.com. And that's just good to have because if you have an incident and pass out or something happens, somebody could maybe see your card. So keep that handy. You can also contact your accommodation place ahead. Some will have restaurants along with your lodging. You can ask them, can they prepare special meals? Do they have a fridge or microwave? Could they shop for you before arrival? Which I think is more popular if you're in a long term accommodation. Another thing is to check the grocery options. And that was one of my favorite things to do when we were in Europe the last couple of times was to go to the Aldi store or the Little and just walk the aisles and just see how it differed. And also something similar to how we would shop for groceries and to also watch how the locals were buying their groceries. So the local supermarkets are a good place to go. There are usually health food stores around and there may be specialty shops like gluten free bakeries or vegan cafes. And there were also in the cities, there were enough markets on the street displaying fresh produce and fruits and baked goods and such. And so you could certainly explore, investigate and ask questions. And a lot of it, it's good to plan ahead with that. And that's something else that we use AI to help with, you know, what's close. And if you need something special, you could even do that research, find a place that has what you need and find a hotel that's close to whatever supermarket or health food store works for you. And then you really need to have a backup plan just in case. Again, we mentioned this before, keep some emergency food available. Find two to three restaurants near your hotel that, you know, have the options that you need, say you're vegan or vegetarian or gluten free. Check out the menus in advance and then again, see where they are and have a good map to get to your new favorite grocery store. So we can review and we can put this all together into a simple travel outline for our pre-trip planning. Remember to identify your dietary needs. Research the local cuisine. Check for kitchen access in your accommodations. Enlist your must-have foods and pack them. Prepare your medical documents. And have what you may need for the first 24 hours and have that in your little food kit. And that's especially important if you have some kind of flight delay or there's a strike or something else happens. Remember that's part of the layering strategy for packing. Have some shelf-stable staples. And if possible, think about your perishable items. And if you're in a place that will have a kitchen, find those and put them in the fridge or freezer right away. We mentioned the mini kitchen kit too. And don't forget your allergy medical kit. And again, I'm going to put all of these notes in the show notes so you can have a list. When you do your destination research, look at apps and tools, translation cards, grocery stores, restaurants that can accommodate your diet, and accommodation support. They may be able to help you. And for your daily travel strategy, carry snacks, communicate clearly, wipe surfaces, pace your meals, and keep backups. Thanks for joining us today and hope this helps a little with planning for your diet while you are traveling. See you next week. (Transcribed by TurboScribe.

Show Notes

Music

Links to Referenced Resources

Specialized Food Apps and Pre-trip Planning Tips

Living The Could Life - A 70-Day Workbook For Living Well After Body Change

Change Theories for Better Travel

Robert and Theresa — Tue, 08 Sep 2026 15:46:24 +0000

Our travel improves when we understand change theories.

Ouch! A later-in-life bodily issue forced us to look at some change theories. No way would we give up travel, but no way could we travel in the same way that we used to. Searching the web showed us a few change theories that seemed strange at first. However, we started using such change theories in our daily lives.

Of the several change theories that we learned about, one of our favorites is the Spoon Theory. We use that personally quite often. Considering that we had never heard of it until recently, we have added it to the top of our list of change theories.

AS AN AMAZON ASSOCIATE I EARN FROM QUALIFYING PURCHASES.

Transcript

Click Here for Transcript Speaker2: Imagine waking up, walking into your kitchen, and opening the silverware drawer, only to realize that the handful of random spoons sitting inside are literally the only currency you have to survive the rest of the day. Speaker1: Right. Yeah, it's a completely different reality. Speaker2: Exactly. Every single thing you do, you know, showering, making coffee, answering a quick email, it can cost you one of those spoons. And when they're gone, I mean, you are just done. So if you're prepping for a meeting, or maybe you're just incredibly curious about how humans adapt, this deep dive is for you. We're looking at a stack of transcripts today from a project called Living the Could Life. Speaker1: Yeah, and it's this massive, really fascinating synthesis of discussions. It serves as this incredible overview of how people actually rebuild their lives after major physical or energetic shifts. Speaker2: It's just so relevant for anyone dealing with, well, having a human body. Speaker1: Totally. We're decoding the behavioral psychology, the neurobiology, and, you know, the really gritty logistical realities of living with chronic illnesses, disabilities, or even just natural age-related changes. Speaker2: Because aging comes for all of us. Speaker1: Exactly. It's basically a masterclass in how to construct a life that feels positive, realistic, and highly intentional, without all the info overload. Speaker2: And by the end of this deep dive, you will seriously never look at a drawer full of silverware, or the word should, the same way ever again. Speaker1: Oh, absolutely not. The sources make this bold claim right out of the gate, which is that before we can even talk about changing our physical habits, you know, our daily routines or energy management adaptation has to start with our vocabulary. Speaker2: Yeah, the language we use to process our reality, it basically dictates what we can physically do. Speaker1: It does. And it starts specifically with the words we use in our own heads. The sources lean really heavily on Dr. Shad Helmstetter's research on self-talk. Speaker2: Right. The brain as a literal processor. Speaker1: Exactly. He points out something foundational to neurobiology. The brain is a literal processor. It literally does not distinguish between a casual wish and a direct command. It just follows the strongest programming you feed it. Speaker2: It's basically an obedient machine. Like, it doesn't have a sense of irony or nuance when it comes to your internal dialogue. Speaker1: Precisely. And that brings us to the immense biological danger of the word should. Helmstetter classifies should as level two self-talk. Speaker2: Level two, okay. Speaker1: Yeah. It's a level of recognition, but it's deeply tied to disbelief, pressure, and guilt. When you tell yourself, like, I should get more exercise, but I'm tired, your brain hears that should and instantly triggers a subtle threat response. Speaker2: Because should feels like, um, like a nagging external boss standing over your shoulder with a clipboard. Speaker1: Yes. That's exactly it. Speaker2: It just makes you feel inadequate, which immediately makes you want to rebel and, I don't know, sit on the couch instead. Speaker1: And that external pressure creates a measurable physiological reaction. Should activates the amygdala, which is, you know, the brain as fear center. It induces mild stress and guilt. Speaker2: Wow. Just from one word. Speaker1: Just from that one word. And when the brain feels threatened or pressured, it goes into a defensive posture. It justifies why you aren't doing the thing. It actually inhibits the prefrontal cortex. Speaker2: Which is the part responsible for problem solving. Speaker1: Yeah. Exactly. Problem solving and forward action. It literally shuts that down. Speaker2: Which is why the sources heavily contrast should with the word could. They classify could as level three self-talk. Right. Level three. So if should is the demanding boss, could is more like an internal explorer handing you a map. It moves the brain away from obligation and toward choice. But I mean, let me quiz back a little here. Is it really as simple as swapping one single word? Does the brain actually rewire just because you said could instead of should? Speaker1: It sounds too easy. Right. But the underlying mechanism is actually profound. Could lowers that threat response we just talked about. It shifts the brain into a state of possibility, curiosity, and most importantly, safety. Speaker2: And a safe brain is ready to learn. Speaker1: Exactly. A brain that feels safe is primed for neuroplasticity. The ability to form new neural connections. But we have to be incredibly careful here because the sources identify two very different types of could. Speaker2: Wait. The grief could versus the agency could. Speaker1: Yes. The grief could operates entirely in the past tense. It is saying something like, I could run faster 10 years ago, or I could navigate this airport without help before I got sick. Speaker2: It anchors you in loss. Speaker1: Completely. You are programming your literal processor with a continuous loop of mourning, which reinforces a state of helplessness. Speaker2: So the antidote to that is the agency could. Speaker1: Exactly. The agency could operates strictly in the present or future tense. I could take a 10 minute walk today or, you know, I could try a modified seated version of this task. Speaker2: That activates self-efficacy. It tells your brain that you have capability right now in the exact body you currently have, not the one you used to have. Speaker1: Right. And there's also this concept mentioned in the sources called the pink elephant rule. Speaker2: Oh, I love this one. The visual cortex struggles with the word not. Speaker1: Yes. If you tell yourself, uh, I shouldn't be nervous about this doctor's appointment, your brain skips right over the shouldn't and zeros in on the word nervous. It visualizes the anxiety. Speaker2: It's like telling someone, whatever you do, do not think of a pink elephant. Speaker1: And boom, there's the pink elephant. Your visual cortex conjures the exact image you supply. But if you shift that to an agency could and say, I could be calm, you feed the brain a positive target to move toward. Speaker2: It's one thing to change your vocabulary to. I could though. I mean, that positive self-talk kind of falls apart if you're constantly haunted by the exact precise memories of what your healthy body used to be able to do. Speaker1: Yeah. That's a huge roadblock for a lot of people. Speaker2: Right. So to actually adapt, we have to look at how the brain fundamentally alters the way it stores memories as we age or as we go through these major life shifts. Speaker1: Which takes us into this fascinating concept called fuzzy trace theory or FTT. Speaker2: FTT. Yeah. Speaker1: It's a dual process model of memory that explains how we actually extract meaning from our lives. So we store two types of memories for any event. First, we have verbatim traces. Speaker2: Which are the exact objective details. Speaker1: Right. The precise facts of what happens. Second, we have just traces. These represent the bottom line, meaning the emotional truth or like the core lesson of the event. Speaker2: And the research here shows something that completely upends how we normally view cognitive aging. As we get older, our brains naturally move away from retaining those sharp verbatim details and lean way more heavily into just reasoning. Speaker1: Which the sources emphasize is not necessarily cognitive decline, it is an upgrade to wisdom. Speaker2: Okay, wait. I have to push back a bit on that. Isn't losing exact details genuinely a bad thing? It sounds a little bit like we're just trying to put a cheerful, positive spin on memory loss to make people feel better about it. Speaker1: I totally get that. And it is a completely valid fear. Losing those sharp details is genuinely a form of grief. And we really shouldn't minimize the frustration of, you know, forgetting a specific name or a date. Speaker2: It's scary. Speaker1: It is. But from a purely neurological survival standpoint, the brain is trading that verbatim data for something far more useful. Accumulating verbatim details takes up immense metabolic energy. Speaker2: Oh, so it's a resources thing. Speaker1: Exactly. As we gain experience, the brain filters out the noise to extract the core lesson. People change their behavior when the meaning of an event shifts, not when they memorize a list of facts. Gist is what actually drives human decision making. Speaker2: The sources give a really clear medical example of this. So imagine a doctor tells a patient they have exactly a 22.2% risk of a surgical complication. Speaker1: Right, so that 22.2% is the verbatim trace. Speaker2: But no human being makes a life-altering medical decision based on visualizing the number 22.2. They extract the gist of that data, like, that risk feels too high, I need to protect my body, or that risk is negligible, let's do the surgery. Speaker1: We act on the gist always. And when we apply this to body disruptions, letting go of the verbatim details of your old healthy body is the only way to accept the gist of what you can still do. Speaker2: Like the example with Parkinson's in the text. The verbatim detail is the physical tremor. It's the mechanical difficulty of the movement. But the gist is their deep intention to move, to connect, to be part of the room. Or for someone experiencing memory loss, the verbatim is forgetting the specific details of a past vacation. But the gist is the enduring joy and the emotional bond they share with the person sitting right next to them. Speaker1: I love that. You stop worrying about the verbatim shoulds of your physical limitations and you start living in the gist-coulds of your human spirit. Speaker2: It's a beautiful foundation. But, I mean, eventually you have to execute these intentions in the real physical world. And what happens when your body simply hits a wall? A positive gist mindset cannot manufacture cellular energy out of thin air. Speaker1: No, it definitely can't. And that brings us to the cold, hard economics of chronic illness. Speaker2: Which brings us right back to that silverware drawer we started with. The origin story of spoon theory is just famous in the chronic illness community. Speaker1: Oh yeah, it's legendary. Speaker2: It started in a diner in 2003. A woman named Christine Miserandino was trying to explain to her healthy friend what it physically cost to live with lupus. Words just weren't working. So she grabbed 12 spoons from the tables around them, handed them to her friend and said, this is your energy for the day. Speaker1: Right, those spoons represented her daily biological budget. And the profound realization of spoon theory is that healthy people wake up with an abundant, almost limitless reserve of energy. Speaker2: They don't even calculate the cost of existing. Speaker1: Exactly. But for someone with a systemic body disruption, every single action has a tangible, non-refundable cost. Speaker2: The breakdown in the sources is staggering when you actually look at the mechanics. If you are healthy, waking up and taking a shower costs zero spoons. You don't even think about it. Speaker1: No, not at all. Speaker2: But if you have lupus, waking up with severe joint inflammation costs two spoons before your feet even hit the floor. And if you have ME-CFS, which is myalgic encephalomyelitis or chronic fatigue syndrome, waking up unrefreshed might cost four spoons. Speaker1: And then taking a hot shower could cost three more because the heat causes blood to pool in your lower extremities, which leads to this intense dizziness. Speaker2: So by the time the commute to work is over, the healthy person might have spent, what, zero to three spoons? Speaker1: Yeah, at most. While the person with lupus has spent seven and the person with ME-CFS has spent 18 spoons before they even reach lunchtime. Speaker2: That's incredible. They're operating in severe biological debt before the day has really even begun. Speaker1: And we aren't just talking about a person being tired. That's a huge misconception. We are talking about literal cellular failure. With ME-CFS, the mitochondria in the cells are failing to convert ATP, the molecular currency of cellular energy, into usable fuel. Speaker2: Wow. The sources also mention POTS, right? Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome. Speaker1: Yes, POTS is a perfect example. This is where your autonomic nervous system misfires so badly that just standing up to brush your teeth causes your heart rate to spike to 150 beats per minute. Speaker2: So your body is running a marathon while you are literally just standing at the bathroom sink. Exactly. So having a chronic illness is basically like living on a prepaid debit card with a randomized wildly fluctuating balance every single morning while everyone else around you is walking around with a limitless credit card. Speaker1: That is a perfect analogy. And to manage that randomized debit card, you have to use a clinical tool called activity aggregation scoring. Speaker2: Activity aggregation scoring. It sounds complicated. Speaker1: It just means evaluating the true comprehensive spoon price of a task. It's not just the physical cost of like walking or lifting. You have to calculate the cognitive cost of focusing on a screen, the sensory cost of navigating bright fluorescent lights, and you know, the emotional cost of interacting with people. Speaker2: That is just an exhausting amount of mental math just to exist. Speaker1: It really is, which is why occupational therapists rely on the four P's to help people survive this economy. Speaker2: Okay, the four P's. Pacing, planning, prioritizing, and positioning. Speaker1: Right, and positioning is a prime example of changing the physical mechanics of a task to save a spoon. It can be as simple as just sitting on a tall stool while you chop vegetables at the counter. Speaker2: Because by sitting, your heart doesn't have to work as hard against gravity to pump blood. Speaker1: Exactly. Which preserves your energy for something more meaningful later in the day. Speaker2: It's the same with managing the cognitive load of a disability. Like if someone experiences vision loss, their brain is suddenly working twice as hard neurologically just to keep them balanced and to navigate a familiar room. Speaker1: Every little thing costs extra. Speaker2: Right. But, you know, when your daily spoon count is consistently that low, despite all the pacing and planning, you eventually have no choice but to rely on external support. I mean, running out of spoons just means you need help. Speaker1: Yes, and bringing someone into your fragile energy economy requires extreme care. The dynamic between a care receiver and a caregiver is incredibly delicate. Speaker2: It can fall apart so easily if the fit is wrong. Speaker1: Totally. The sources outline some major red flags that indicate this partnership is going to fail. Speaker2: Like what? Speaker1: Well, for caregivers, red flags include operating with a savior complex, or becoming easily frustrated when tasks take longer than expected, or routinely ignoring the care receiver's stated spoon limits. Speaker2: Oh, that's a big one. Speaker1: Yeah, or frankly, just lacking the physical strength to safely help with heavy transfers from a bed to a chair. Speaker2: But there are red flags for the care receivers to watch for in their own behavior, too, right? Speaker1: Oh, absolutely. Things like expecting your caregiver to be available 247 without their own rest, or stubbornly refusing to use adaptive tools like a shower chair that would make the caregiver's job significantly easier. Speaker2: Or operating with the expectation that the caregiver can just magically read your mind. Speaker1: Exactly. Which is where spoon theory comes back in as this vital, neutral language to bridge the gap, saying, I am out of spoons removes the moral weight from the situation. Speaker2: It establishes a hard biological boundary, rather than sounding like a personal failure or some passive-aggressive excuse to get out of an activity. Right, it depersonalizes it. But practically speaking, how do you actually avoid the silent resentment that inevitably seems to build up when one person relies so heavily on another for their basic daily needs? Speaker1: It's tough, but the sources emphasize proactive, structured communication. Before committing to a long-term caregiving dynamic, you do a trial run. Speaker2: Like a weekend stress test. Speaker1: Exactly. Treat a weekend as a stress test to evaluate the physical and emotional compatibility. Use clear I-statements. But the most effective protocol they suggest is explicitly checking both people's spoon levels before discussing anything logistical or emotional. Speaker2: Oh, that makes so much sense. If the caregiver has zero spoons left after a long shift, and the receiver has zero spoons because of a symptom flare, trying to discuss finances or scheduling is guaranteed to end in a massive argument. Speaker1: Guaranteed. You have to acknowledge the biological debt first, and delay the conversation until the bank accounts are replenished. Speaker2: So taking all of this out of theory and turning it into a real, sustainable life obviously requires a blueprint. We have the new language of could, the just reasoning for memory, the spoon counting, the caregiving boundaries. The sources provide a framework for integrating all this called a 70-day change plan. Speaker1: Yes, and they suggest using travel as the ultimate stress test for this new lifestyle. Speaker2: Travel is definitely a stress test, but why 70 days? Speaker1: The timeline of 70 days is rooted in hard neurological data. Dr. Filippolali's behavioral research demonstrates that it takes an average of 66 days for a new complex behavior to become automatic. Speaker2: Okay, so roughly two months. Speaker1: Right. And furthermore, a recent 2025 study from McGill University showed that 10 weeks, which is 70 days of consistent cognitive practice, actually rejuvenates the brain's cholinergic system in older adults. Speaker2: Wait, how does that actually work mechanically? I mean, does the thinking positive thoughts just magically heal the brain? Speaker1: Not magically, mechanically. The cholinergic system is the neural network responsible for flexibility, learning, and readiness to change. The plan revolves around a daily noticing practice. Speaker2: It's not just forcing toxic positivity. Speaker1: No, not at all. You ask yourself five simple questions every day, such as, what did I notice in my body today? What felt easier by just 1%? What surprised me? Speaker2: Okay, small things. Speaker1: Exactly. By forcing your brain to scan for novel positive stimuli, you are giving that cholinergic system a daily workout. This practice literally thickens the neural pathways associated with adaptation. You stimulate acetylcholine production. Wow. Yeah, and over 70 days, this repetition moves you from level three self-talk, I could, into level four self-talk, which is identity-driven. I am. Speaker2: Oh, I see. So you evolve from saying, I can be patient with my fatigue, to, I am someone who honors my body's current pace. Speaker1: Precisely. And when you apply this recalibrated identity to travel, you realize you need a highly practical approach, because travel is a chaotic environment practically designed to steal your spoons. Speaker2: It really is. So the sources recommend something called the buffer protocol. The first rule is physiological. Never book a 5 a.m. flight. Never. Because waking up at 2 a.m. completely disrupts your circadian rhythm, it spikes your cortisol levels, and it bankrupts your baseline energy before you even reach the airport doors. Speaker1: You're starting in the negative. And the second rule is logistical. Swallow your pride and use TSA Cares or the airport wheelchairs. Speaker2: I mean, the psychological resistance to accepting a wheelchair at an airport is massive. For a lot of people, it feels like giving up or publicly signaling a loss of independence. Speaker1: And that right there is the verbatim memory of a healthy body haunting the present reality. But the occupational therapy math is undeniable. Walking 500 yards on a hard airport concourse while pulling a heavy bag costs 4 spoons. Riding in a wheelchair costs zero. Speaker2: So it's not giving up. It is a highly strategic move to protect your investment in the trip. Speaker1: Exactly. You save those 4 spoons so you actually have the cellular energy to enjoy a meal when you land at your destination. Speaker2: You shift travel from being a gamble with your health into a controlled environment where you manage your spoons rather than letting the environment steal them. Speaker1: Which is also the logic behind the one major event rule. Speaker2: Right. A healthy tourist itinerary is, like, a museum at 9am, a walking tour at noon, and a dinner show at night. Speaker1: Which is a spoon nightmare. A spoon-managed itinerary allows for just one anchor event per day. You do the midday museum, perhaps using a rented mobility scooter, followed by a mandatory horizontal rest period in a dark, climate-controlled hotel room. Speaker2: Just to drop your heart rate and let your autonomic nervous system reset. Speaker1: Exactly. You are intentionally building environmental redundancies. You're designing a vacation. And really, by extension, a life around the concrete reality of your biology, rather than the memory of your past capabilities. Speaker2: Adaptation really is a quiet, continuous recalibration, isn't it? Speaker1: It really is. It requires shifting from the pressure of should to the possibility of could. It requires focusing on the core meaning of your experiences, the gist, rather than mourning the exact verbatim details of the past. Speaker2: Than respecting your biological bank account. Which brings up this massive, thought-provoking shift in perspective regarding how we view human vitality as a whole. We are so conditioned by modern society to view health as the absolute absence of illness. Speaker1: Right, like if you're not perfectly able-bodied, you aren't healthy. Speaker2: Exactly. We think of vitality as the total absence of physical limitation. But what if the way modern society measures health entirely misses the point? Speaker1: Oh, I love this question. What if true vitality is actually the mastery of your specific energy economy? What if your current physical limitations are not a wall blocking your path, but they are the exact architectural blueprint you need to design your most intentional, authentic life? Speaker2: When you have a limitless credit card of energy, it is incredibly easy to waste your days on things that lack actual meaning. But when you only have 12 spoons, you become fiercely, beautifully intentional about where every single one goes. Speaker1: That limitation forces profound clarity. Speaker2: It really does. So tomorrow morning, when you open that drawer to grab a spoon for your coffee, take a second to look at that silverware a little differently. Notice where you are choosing to spend your biological currency today. Catch yourself using the word should, and see what happens when you replace it with could. Thank you for joining us on this deep dive, respect your baseline, and we will catch you next time. (Transcribed by TurboScribe. Go Unlimited to remove this message.) < Show Notes

Music

Links to Referenced Resources

Victory Cruise Lines

The Boat Company

Spoon Spending Chart

Living The Could Life - A 70-Day Workbook For Living Well After Body Change

Cruising the Midwest. Really? Alaska?

Robert and Theresa — Tue, 01 Sep 2026 14:38:59 +0000

It's a joke that you can cruise the Midwest. Or is it not?

It's definitely not a joke that cruising the Midwest is a real thing. In this episode you will not only hear about cruising the Midwest, but also cruising in Alaska. Two entirely different experiences. But, they have so much in common. Both explore parts of the world that some might miss. Both are welcoming to guests with disabilities. Take a listen. to learn about cruising the Midwest. Then, continue to hear about a special Alaska cruise company trying to save the wonderful Tongass National Forest.

AS AN AMAZON ASSOCIATE I EARN FROM QUALIFYING PURCHASES.

Transcript

Click Here for Transcript Theresa: Robert: Theresa: Hey, this is Theresa, and we are so thrilled that we've already reached 20 episodes. That's a huge milestone for us. Most people quit, but we keep trudging on and hope you are enjoying our content. Last week we did half of a podcast done by our friends at Google Notebook. We just plugged in a bunch of our earlier podcasts regarding travel and asked them to put something together. So we did that first, and this week we're doing the second part. We are getting to the exciting part about cruising in the Midwest. Now who's ever thought about that? Well, having lived on Great Lakes many of my years, I think it's spectacular. So take a listen. Speaker 2: We aren't going to the predictable Caribbean islands or the crowded ports of the Mediterranean. No. Speaker 1: Instead, the sources take this floating base camp somewhere completely unexpected. The American Midwest. We are diving into the Great Lakes. Speaker 2: The inland seas of North America. Speaker 1: I have to admit, I completely geeked out over the geography here. When you say lake, people usually picture a calm, glassy pond where you take a rowboat out to fish. The Great Lakes are not ponds. They contain roughly 20% of the entire world's fresh surface water. To put the scale into perspective, Lake Superior alone is the size of the country of Austria. Speaker 2: It's massive. Speaker 1: Lake Michigan is larger than Croatia. Speaker 2: They are massive, dynamic, violently powerful bodies of water that generate their own distinct weather systems and possess a deeply ingrained, somewhat tragic maritime culture. Speaker 1: Right. If you look at the history, Great Lakes cruising is actually not a new, modern invention. Back in the late 1800s and early 1900s, massive coal-fired steamships operated as floating palaces, carrying wealthy travelers and immigrants between industrial hubs like Chicago, Detroit, and various Canadian ports. It was a thriving industry. But then the interstate highway system was built, commercial air travel took off, and the Great Lakes passenger industry essentially died overnight. Speaker 2: But what the sources explore is the modern renaissance of this industry. However, it hasn't returned in the form of massive 4,000 passenger floating cities. It has returned in the form of small, intimate expedition ships. The specific vessel detailed in the sources is called the Victory First. We're talking about a capacity of maybe 200 to 400 passengers maximum. Speaker 1: So absolutely no towering water slides, no rock climbing walls, no massive casinos, and no hairy chess contests by the pool. Speaker 2: Exactly. It is a quiet, deeply destination-focused, highly educational experience. And that smaller scale is vital for accessibility. On a megaship, just walking from your cabin at the front of the ship to the dining room at the back can be a half-mile journey. On a ship like the Victory Third, the footprint is condensed. Everything is manageable. Speaker 1: The sources outline the entire experience, and it starts with the logistics of boarding. They departed from Toronto, Canada. They stayed pre-cruise at the Westin Harbor Castle, which they noted had a wonderfully accessible entrance, allowing a seamless transition from the hotel directly to the port. Speaker 2: Right. Speaker 1: And when it came time to actually board the Victory I, the crew employed a technique that is central to the philosophy of adaptive travel. Speaker 2: Yes. With an estimated 25 to 30 percent of the passengers on these types of expedition cruises using some form of mobility aid, whether that is a cane, a walker, or a wheelchair, the crew cannot just point to a steep metal ramp and say, good luck. They employ what they call the sailor's handshake. Speaker 1: Detail what that actually looks like mechanically, because it is a very specific type of assistance. Speaker 2: It is not a passive offer of a hand to hold. A standard handhold is unstable. If the guest slips, both people's grips can easily break. The sailor's handshake is a firm, highly calibrated forearm-to-forearm grip. Speaker 1: Like a Roman handshake. Speaker 2: Exactly. The crew member anchors their stance, locks forearms with the guest, and physically bridges the gap between the solid dock and the moving gangway. It's a transfer of stability. It is a level of human care that goes far beyond structural ADA compliance. They are using their own bodies to act as the infrastructure. Speaker 1: Inside the ship, that thoughtful accessibility continues. They describe the coastal dining room, which is completely step-free, ensuring mobility devices can glide right up the tables. But they also highlight a really unique culinary feature on board. An interactive restaurant simply called the grill. Speaker 2: Which sounds like a phenomenal sensory experience, provided you are prepared for it. Speaker 1: Oh, it sounded so incredibly cool. You go up to the grill, and instead of just ordering off the menu and waiting for a plate, the staff brings you a specialized volcanic stone that has been heated in an oven to 400 degrees Fahrenheit. You literally cook your own cuts of premium meat or fresh fish right at your own table on this scorching rock. It's highly interactive. It's communal. You control exactly how your food is prepared, and it is all included in the fare. Speaker 2: However, the sources are meticulous in their auditing, and they do note a significant architectural caveat regarding the grill. Speaker 1: Right. To get to the sundeck space just above the grill, guests are required to navigate a set of pretty steep maritime-style stairs. There's no elevator access to that specific upper vantage point. Speaker 2: Which serves as a very realistic reminder that no ship, regardless of how modern or well-designed, is 100% perfect for every single body. But what makes the Great Lakes Expedition so compelling are the ports of call. Because you aren't dealing with the ancient, protected, and often untouchable cobblestone grids of medieval Europe, many of these Midwestern American and Canadian cities have newly revitalized, heavily paved, highly accessible industrial waterfronts. Speaker 1: Let's track the actual route they sailed. They start near the iconic Niagara Falls, but they dock in a port called Port Colborne. Now, instead of just taking a standard bus to look at the water from a safe distance, the excursion they chose took them to a decommissioned hydroelectric power plant. Speaker 2: This sounded amazing. Speaker 1: They boarded a massive, fully accessible industrial elevator and plunged 180 feet below the Earth's surface. Speaker 2: They entered a half-mile-long, perfectly flat concrete tunnel that was originally carved out of the bedrock to expel water from the turbines. Speaker 1: And they rolled all the way down this tunnel, deep underground, and it empties out onto a viewing platform literally right at the explosive base of the falls. You feel the vibration of the water in your chest. It is a brilliant example of repurposing heavy industrial infrastructure to create a deeply accessible, thrilling tourism experience. Speaker 2: From there, the Victory Eye crossed Lake Erie and traveled down to Cleveland, Ohio, specifically to visit the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. But the sources do not just list the exhibits. They analyze this stop through a very specific, critical sensory lens. Speaker 1: Right. If you're a music fan, it sounds great. But if you have vision impairments or sensory processing issues, the Rock Hall is actually a massive, overwhelming challenge. The architects intentionally designed the museum to be kept very dark in order to preserve the fragile costumes and paper artifacts. That low lighting immediately creates a barrier for anyone with depth perception or low vision issues. Speaker 2: Furthermore, the audio environment is chaotic. There is loud, overlapping music playing from dozens of different video screens and exhibits simultaneously. The sound waves are bouncing off the hard glass and steel architecture. Speaker 1: If your brain struggles to filter out competing audio tracks, this environment is essentially a sensory minefield. It goes back to that radio and strobe light analogy. It highlights exactly why pre-planning and reading these types of detailed audits are so crucial. Just because a famous building has a wheelchair ramp at the front door does not mean the interior environment is functionally accessible for your specific body disruption. Speaker 2: Moving onward, the shift sails to Detroit, Michigan. The standard assumption for Detroit tourism is to take automotive factory tours. Instead, the sources highlight a visit to the Detroit Institute of Art to view the massive, breathtaking Diego Rivera murals. It is a powerful reminder that these gritty, industrial, midwestern cities are actually hiding world-class, highly accessible cultural hubs. Speaker 1: Then they sail all the way up into Lake Huron and Lake Michigan, reaching Escanaba, located in Michigan's remote upper peninsula. And this stop was absolutely fascinating. Instead of doing a standard walking tour of the town, they booked a premium excursion to a Michigan State University forestry research facility located deep in the woods. Speaker 2: And this is where the educational aspect of expedition cruising truly shines. They didn't just look at trees, they engaged with cutting-edge environmental science. Speaker 1: They learned about the biochemical differences in maple trees. We all know sugar maple syrup, which is what you put on pancakes, but the researchers were studying red maple syrup, and they discovered that red maple syrup on a molecular level does not support microbial life. Speaker 2: Really? Speaker 1: Yeah. Bacteria cannot grow in it. Because of this, it doesn't require rigorous pasteurization, and the medical community is actively researching its unique properties as a potential hydration and nutrient delivery system for cancer patients who are undergoing severe chemotherapy and cannot tolerate traditional liquids. Speaker 2: That is wild. It's those precise, unexpected moments of profound discovery that make this type of travel so rewarding. You aren't just buying a cheap plastic magnet in a souvenir shop, you're interacting with scientists who are actively trying to solve complex medical disruptions. Speaker 1: And finally, the ship hits Mackinac Island. This is an island entirely frozen in time. Absolutely no motorized cars are allowed on the island, only bicycles and horse-drawn carriages. The sources carefully note the logistics here. While the island does have some specifically adapted carriages that can accommodate a wheelchair trying to board the standard, high-stepping horse carriages can be physically daunting, if not impossible, for someone with limited mobility. Speaker 2: That makes sense. Speaker 1: But if you can manage the logistics, you can visit the incredibly historic Grand Hotel, which boasts the longest contiguous porch in the entire world. Speaker 2: So the Great Lakes offer a highly curated, very manageable, surprisingly accessible adventure. But this brings us to a critical junction in our deep dive. What happens when a traveler with a body disruption decides they want to leave the paved waterfronts, the gentle ramps, and the predictable logistics entirely behind? What if they possess an intense desire to explore a raw environment that actively resists human infrastructure? Speaker 1: To answer that, the sources take us out of the Midwest and transport us to the extreme edge of the continent, the Tongass National Forest in Alaska. Speaker 2: The sheer raw scale of the Tongass is almost unfathomable to the human mind. We're talking about 16 million acres of wilderness. Geographically, it's a splintered, shattered archipelago consisting of over a thousand individual islands violently carved by ancient glaciers into deep saltwater fjords. And crucially, it is a temperate rainforest. It is not an environment designed for human comfort. Speaker 1: Okay, here's where it gets really interesting. The travel organization they chose to navigate this wilderness with is simply called The Boat Company. And the origin story of this specific ecotourism nonprofit is, without a doubt, one of the most bizarre, deeply ironic pieces of environmental history I have ever heard in my life. Speaker 2: It is a phenomenal collision of corporate monopoly, industrial extraction, and radical environmental preservation. The story traces all the way back to the A&P grocery empire. For decades in the mid-20th century, A&P was the undisputed monopolistic king of American retail. They controlled the supply chains. Speaker 1: And the heir to this massive grocery fortune, a young man named Mike McIntosh, decides to go up to Alaska in the 1950s. He takes a job working the slum line at the Waterfall Cannery. No, this cannery was not a quaint local business. It existed for one brutal, highly efficient reason, to extract, process, and can millions of pounds of Alaskan salmon to supply every single A&P store across America. Speaker 2: Right. Massive extraction. Speaker 1: It was mass, unchecked industrial extraction on a staggering scale. But while Mike is up there, elbow deep in fish guts and breathing in diesel fumes from the fishing fleet, something unexpected happens. He completely falls in love with the pristine, fragile ecosystem of the Alaskan wilderness. Speaker 2: So fast forward a few decades to the 1970s. The patriarchs have passed and the immense family inheritance is being distributed. Instead of doing what most heirs do, buying fleets of luxury yachts or investing in massive real estate developments, Mike McIntosh pivots. He takes his massive portion of the grocery fortune and creates a philanthropic foundation entirely focused on environmental protection. Speaker 1: But he is incredibly pragmatic. He doesn't just sit in a plush corner office in Washington, D.C. writing checks to charities. He realizes that there are brilliant environmental lawyers fighting tooth and nail in the capital to save a forest they have never physically seen. They're arguing over topographic maps in windowless conference rooms. Speaker 2: Yeah, totally disconnected from the reality. Speaker 1: Right. So Mike decides he needs to bring the heavyweights, the aggressive lawyers from the Natural Resources Defense Council, the lobbyists from the Sierra Club all the way up to the Tongass to physically show them the towering ancient cedars and the whales they're fighting for. Speaker 2: He understood that to fuel their legal stamina, he needed them to feel the scale and the overwhelming fragility of the landscape firsthand. But to navigate a splintered archipelago of a thousand islands, he needed a boat. And this is where we encounter the ultimate historical irony of the story. The specific vessel Mike McIntosh purchased in 1980 to launch this aggressive conservation effort was a ship called the Observer. Speaker 1: And do you know who owned the Observer before Mike bought it? Speaker 2: I do. And it's crazy. Speaker 1: Standard Oil. It was quite literally a heavy duty vessel used by fossil fuel executives to cruise the Alaskan coast and survey areas for mass industrial drilling operations. And Mike buys it, strips it and repurposes it to save the very forest it was designed to exploit. It is such a pragmatic, ruthless approach to conservation. He weaponized the heavy infrastructure of industry to fight that exact same industry. Speaker 2: Exactly. And that ethos of pragmatic adaptation survives today. The boat company currently operates two small, rugged vessels, one being the Mist Cove, carrying only about 20 to 24 guests at a time. And they operate on a philosophy that Captain Jim, the master of the vessel, proudly refers to as the anti-itinerary. Speaker 1: I love this concept. Trying to fight the weather in the Tongass National Forest is like trying to fight gravity. You will lose every single time. The captain explicitly states on day one that there is no set schedule. The entire trip, every secluded cove they anchor in, every muddy hike they attempt to take, is dictated entirely by the immediate unpredictable whims of the wind, the tidal shifts and the migration patterns of the wildlife. Speaker 2: It requires a total psychological reset of the modern guests' expectations. In normal life, you force the environment to bend to your outlook calendar and your dinner reservations. In the Tongass, if a 50 knot wind suddenly picks up, you pivot. And above all else, you have to accept the rain. Speaker 1: Oh yeah, the rain. Speaker 2: The Tongass receives upwards of 200 inches of rain annually. It's not just bad weather. The rain is the literal biological engine of the entire ecosystem. You put on your heavy rubber boots, you zip up your Gore-Tex and you actively engage with the wet. Speaker 1: But here is the massive logistical problem. Getting into that wet, rugged, violently unpredictable environment presents a monumental hurdle for physical accessibility. And this is where the sources highlight a critical, unavoidable conflict in maritime law. Speaker 2: We are talking about SOLUS regulations, the International Convention for the Safety of Life at Sea. Speaker 1: Right. To prevent a ship from catastrophic rapid flooding in the event that the hull is breached by a rock or a rogue wave, SOLUS requires the installation of high watertight steel bulkheads. You find these at the bottom of exterior doorways and sectioning off interior hallways. The logic is brutal, but necessary. You literally sacrifice a flooded hallway to save the buoyancy of the entire ship. Speaker 2: Makes sense for safety, sure. Speaker 1: But these bulkheads create a 6 inch to 12 inch solid steel lip in the doorways, which means that true ADA wheelchair compliance, a smooth flat roll through, is physically and legally impossible on these small, rugged vessels. Speaker 2: The architecture of the ship inherently, legally fails the disabled traveler. The steel cannot be removed. So if the structure cannot adapt, how does the boat company adapt? The sources highlight the philosophy of the current operator, Hunter McIntosh. Instead of relying on concrete ramps and automated elevators, they rely on a rigorous hiring process to find, quote, good human beings. Speaker 1: Now, when I first read that, it sounded like generic corporate fluff, like, ah, we hire good people. But when you look at the mechanics of the trip, it is actually a profound, highly functional practice of radical hospitality. Because they legally cannot cut down the steel doors, they compensate for the architectural failure with immense human empathy and physical assistance. We see this manifested perfectly when they load the skiffs. Speaker 2: The skiffs are the small, wobbly, motorized outboard boats used to transport guests from the anchored mothership to the muddy shores of the islands. Boarding them while they bob in the ocean swell is precarious for anyone, let alone someone with limited mobility. Speaker 1: And this is where the sailor's handshape returns, but on a much more intense level. When guests are trying to time the swell and step down into those wobbly skiffs, the crew never, ever rushes them. They do not look at their watches. They offer that firm, unhurried forearm-to-forearm grip. They use their own core strength to absorb the kinetic energy of waves, safely bridging the terrifying gap between the steelship and the small boat. Speaker 2: They are actively replacing missing structural infrastructure with highly trained human infrastructure. And the emotional anchor of this entire Alaskan section of the source material is a story that perfectly encapsulates this ecos. It is a story about a guest with low vision attempting to hike a trail known as Moss Gully on the remote Brothers Islands. Speaker 1: This specific story really got me. So you have a guest who has significant vision impairments. She wants to experience the forest, so she joins a guided hike. But as they get deeper into the Tongass, the terrain becomes incredibly hostile. There are massive hidden tree roots slick with rain. The moss is deep and spongy. And beneath the dense canopy of the ancient cedars, the lighting becomes incredibly flat, destroying any sense of depth perception. Speaker 2: It just becomes too dangerous for her to navigate. Speaker 1: Exactly. She physically cannot continue the hike without risking a severe fall. Now think about how this scenario plays out in a standard corporate group tour. Speaker 2: In a standard tour, this is exactly where the friction and the anxiety peak. The tour guide starts stressing about staying on schedule to get back to the bus. The rest of the group gets impatient. The guest with the vision impairment feels an overwhelming sense of shame and feels like a burden. The entire atmosphere becomes tense and miserable. Speaker 1: Exactly. But remember the core philosophy, the anti-itinerary. There is no bus to catch. There is no schedule. There is no rush. Speaker 2: So how does the guide react? Speaker 1: A young guide named Andrew assesses the situation. He simply tells the rest of the able-bodied group to hike on ahead with another guide. He does not pressure the low vision guest to push through the pain. He doesn't awkwardly try to drag her over the slick roots to conquer the trail. He simply sits down next to her on a damp mossy log in the middle of the trail. And they just sit there for hours. They talk about life. They listen to the rain hitting the canopy, and they are completely surrounded by the staggering magnitude of the ancient forest. He allowed her to experience the profound depth of the wilderness entirely on her own terms, at her own pace. Speaker 2: It is a stunning, deeply moving example of human empathy bridging the exact gap where the physical infrastructure and the natural terrain entirely fail. He didn't view her limitation as a problem to be solved. He viewed it as a parameter to adapt to. But this raises a fascinating pivot. If human empathy and unhurried pacing are the keys to accessing the raw wilderness, how do we apply that exact same pacing to dense, ancient, human-built environments? Speaker 1: So what does this all mean for the modern city? To find out, we take our final deep dive into a 750-year-old experiment in extreme urban survival, Amsterdam. Speaker 2: Amsterdam is arguably the world's greatest master class in adapting human civilization to a hostile geography. You look at the beautiful canals and the tall, elegant brick houses, and it looks incredibly stable. But the reality is that the entire city is quite literally built on top of a swampy, unstable peat bog. Speaker 1: Wait, the whole city is on a swamp? Speaker 2: Oh yeah. To create solid ground where none existed, the early Dutch engineers had to drive hundreds of thousands of massive wooden pilings, entire tree trunks, deep through the soft peat, until they hit the solid, compressed sand layer far below the surface. Speaker 1: So the entire magnificent city is propped up on submerged wooden stilts. Speaker 2: Precisely. But here is the terrifying engineering catch that still dictates life in Amsterdam today. Those wooden pilings only retain their structural integrity if they remain completely submerged in an oxygen-free underwater environment. If the groundwater levels drop even slightly and oxygen hits that ancient wood, microbial rot begins almost immediately. Speaker 1: The foundations begin to literally disintegrate, which is exactly why when you walk through Amsterdam, you see those famous leaning houses that look like they're about to topple into the canals. Their wooden foundations have rotted and shifted. Speaker 2: So geography really is destiny here. Managing the complex system of canals and water levels isn't just about keeping your shoes dry during a rainstorm. It is a life or death civic duty to keep your neighbor's house from collapsing into the swamp. And because your neighbor's water management directly affects the structural integrity of your own home, it forced the creation of a society based on deep, highly organized, inescapable cooperation. Speaker 1: That makes total sense. Speaker 2: The Dutch term for it is the polder model. You have to work together, you have to compromise, or everyone collectively sinks. Speaker 1: That underlying culture of intense cooperation is visible everywhere. But it also creates a highly calibrated, incredibly fast-moving urban environment that can be deeply intimidating for a traveler with a mobility issue. Amsterdam is a living, breathing, open-air museum. Speaker 2: But a museum where you're actively, constantly trying not to get run over. Speaker 1: Yes. I mean, I have to warn you, and the sources make this abundantly clear. The bicycle traffic in Amsterdam is not a quaint leisure activity. It is a highly aggressive, deeply efficient mode of mass transit. The locals have spent decades negotiating the physical flow of this traffic. There are dedicated red-paved bike lanes everywhere. Speaker 2: And the cardinal rule for pedestrians, which disabled and able-bodied tourists alike often fail to grasp, is to respect the flow. Speaker 1: Yes. If you, as a tourist, step off the sidewalk and into that red bike lane, and you stop to look at a Google map on your phone, you are throwing a massive wrench into a perfectly tuned high-speed machine. You are a boulder in a fast-moving river. Speaker 2: Listen for the bells. Speaker 1: Exactly. The locals won't necessarily yell at you, but they will aggressively ring their bicycle bells. If you hear the bells, do not freeze. Jump back onto the pedestrian sidewalk immediately. Do not disrupt the negotiated flow of the city. Speaker 2: But despite the chaotic speed of the bicycles and the inherent architectural challenges of navigating a 750-year-old street grid, Amsterdam is remarkably, intentionally accessible. The flat geography of the bog certainly helps, but they have intentionally designed their public transit network, operated by a company called GVB, with modern accessibility firmly in mind. Speaker 1: The newer blue-and-white electric trams that snake through the city feature low-floor entries and designated spacious wheelchair parking spaces. The city buses are equipped with fold-out ramps that the drivers are trained to deploy quickly. The underground metro system features functional elevators at every single station. And the massive ferries that transport thousands of people daily across the Eye River to the northern neighborhoods are completely free, flat, and fully accessible to power chairs. Speaker 2: However, a traveler must remain realistic. The cobblestones are a constant brooding reality in the historic center. They are rough, deeply uneven, and present a significant trip hazard for anyone using a cane, and they cause massive vibration fatigue for anyone in a wheelchair. Speaker 1: And then there are the historic canal houses themselves. Because land was taxed based on the width of the canal frontage, the houses were built incredibly narrow and incredibly tall. This means the stairs leading up to the front doors and the stairs leading down into the basement levels are terrifyingly steep. They create immediate, unsolvable architectural barriers. Speaker 2: The sources contrast the museum experiences beautifully. Massive state-funded institutions like the Wrights Museum and the Van Gogh Museum have been heavily renovated to be highly accessible, with smooth floors and massive glass elevators. But the Anne Frank House, which is located inside one of those historic narrow canal houses, is fundamentally inaccessible to wheelchair users due to its incredibly steep, narrow, historic wooden stairs. Speaker 1: Right, they just can't change it. Speaker 2: Exactly. The museum cannot alter the architecture without destroying the historical integrity of the hiding place. They do, however, offer an immersive virtual reality tour on the ground floor for those who cannot climb. Speaker 1: Which brings us to a specific day trip the sources highly recommend, and it serves as the perfect culmination of everything we've discussed today. Taking a slow, scenic train and bus ride out of the city center to visit Muiderslot Castle. Speaker 2: Muterslot is a fascinating, brutal piece of medieval history. It's a heavy, square, brick fortress, originally built in the 13th century by a ruler named Count Florus V. And it's important to understand that it was not built to be a pretty decorative royal residence. It was a machine designed to extract wealth. Speaker 1: Right, it sat strategically at the mouth of the Vecht River. Count Florus and his soldiers would string a massive, incredibly heavy iron chain entirely across the river, physically blocking wealthy merchant ships from sailing through until they paid a heavy toll. Speaker 2: It was a literal medieval toll booth enforced by armed guards. But Count Florus V made a lot of powerful enemies with that aggressive taxation, was eventually kidnapped by his own nobles, and was brutally murdered. The original castle was destroyed in the ensuing chaos. It was rebuilt about 70 years later on the exact same foundations, which is the imposing, moated version tourists visit today. Speaker 1: But navigating an authentic, defensive medieval fortress with a body disruption requires a healthy, pragmatic dose of realism. Speaker 2: Exactly. When you arrive at Muiderslot, you encounter a dichotomy of accessibility. The exterior grounds, the massive courtyard, the meticulously maintained historical plum orchard, the herb gardens, and the wide paths circling the scenic defensive moat are all flat, well-maintained, and fully accessible. In recognition of this partial accessibility, wheelchair users actually receive free entering to the grounds. Speaker 1: You can roll right over the drawbridge, but the interior of the castle is an entirely different story. Speaker 2: Right. To get up into the defensive towers, the armory, and the historical living quarters, you have to climb spiral stone stairs that are intensely steep, incredibly narrow, and absolutely architecturally necessary for a medieval fortress. There is no hidden elevator shaft carved into the 13th century brick. Speaker 1: And this is where the overarching, profound lesson of the entire Living the Could Life series truly crystallizes into a single moment. You do not have to conquer the stairs to enjoy the castle. Speaker 2: Say that again, because it is the thesis of adaptive travel. Speaker 1: You do not have to conquer the stairs. One of the hosts of the source material, who was navigating a body disruption, arrived at the castle and explicitly chose not to force herself to climb those brutal spiral stairs. She didn't push her body into a pain flare-up just to check a tourist box. Speaker 2: Instead, she adapted. Speaker 1: Yes. She sat in the highly accessible courtyard cafe, bathed in the sunlight. She ordered a hot chocolate. She interacted with a beautiful, highly detailed, tactile bronze model of the castle that was specifically designed for visually impaired visitors to feel the architecture. She watched the other tourists, she looked at the moat, and she simply absorbed the atmosphere of a 700-year-old fortress. Speaker 2: And crucially, she didn't feel lesser than for not going inside the tower. Speaker 1: Exactly. She didn't view the stairs as a personal defeat. She traveled at a pace that fundamentally honored the reality of her body on that specific day. Speaker 2: That is the pure essence of adaptive travel. It's about aggressively removing the external societal pressure of the perfect itinerary and finding deep, authentic joy in the specific environment you can comfortably and safely access. Speaker 1: Okay, let's take a deep breath and recap this incredible, expansive journey we've been on today. We started by completely dismantling the ADA myth, realizing that true functional accessibility in a hotel room requires rigid numbers, nouns, and the psychological comfort of predictability, rather than just a legal checkbox on an architect's blueprint. Speaker 2: We discovered how the brilliant structural engineering of modern cruise ships creates a frictionless, zero-trip environment, offering vital energy autonomy and life-saving ICU-level safety nets for travelers navigating complex chronic conditions. Speaker 1: We sailed the massive inland seas of the Great Lakes on the intimate Victory I, utilizing the physical empathy of the sailor's handshake to explore subterranean power plant tunnels, analyze the sensory minefield of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, and discover the cancer-fighting biochemistry of red maple syrup in a remote forestry lab. Speaker 2: We ventured into the wild, deeply unpredictable reign of the Alaskan Tongass with the boat company, witnessing how radical human empathy and unhurried patience can perfectly compensate for the rigid world, and how specific, thoughtful travel companies use human empathy to bridge the dangerous gaps in physical infrastructure. Yeah. But what if we dared to scale that concept up to a societal level? Imagine if we designed all of our modern cities, our public transit systems, our educational institutions, and our workplaces with that exact same sailor's handshake mentality we found on the wobbly skiffs in the Alaskan wilderness. What would our society look like if instead of just relying on cold legal checklists and pouring concrete for minimum-grade ramps, we actively cultivated human patience, flexibility, and empathetic infrastructure as the absolute baseline of our daily interactions? [Speaker 3] Imagine a world where the guide sitting quietly on the mossy log isn't a rare, beautiful exception to the rule, but the absolute unquestioned standard of how we treat each other. Thank you so much for joining us on this deep dive. Keep learning, stay intensely curious, and always remember to travel the world entirely on your own terms. Show Notes

Music

Links to Referenced Resources

Victory Cruise Lines

The Boat Company

Spoon Spending Chart

Living The Could Life - A 70-Day Workbook For Living Well After Body Change

How to Travel Easily with a Disability

Robert and Theresa — Tue, 25 Aug 2026 15:53:40 +0000

Reprieve

Traveling with a disability, and feeling age proud, are core foundations of Living the Could Life. We packaged an overview of some episodes using Google Notebook. We run out of spoons, too!

The first part of this broadcast jumps around a bit. However, it is entertaining and full of helpful information.

Take a listen to learn more about Traveling with a Disability, staying age proud, and taking advantage of traveling tips.

AS AN AMAZON ASSOCIATE I EARN FROM QUALIFYING PURCHASES.

Transcript

Click Here for Transcript (Transcribed by TurboScribe. Go Unlimited to remove this message.) [Speaker 3] Welcome back to Living the Good Life. Today we're doing something a little bit different. We are proud to announce that we recently finished our 20th episode of Living the Good Life, so we are going to do a bit of a review of all the episodes. Our friends at Google Notebook compiled a bit of a talk based on our previous audio that we sent to them. We're going to do it in two parts. There will be a part about travel, and we were talking about several different kinds of travel, and so as not to make it too long, there'll be a part one and part two. [Speaker 2] Imagine you've just spent like 12 absolutely exhausting hours traveling. I mean, you've navigated the chaotic airport terminals, you've squeezed into this shockingly narrow airplane seat, you've somehow wrangled your luggage into a taxi, and finally, finally, you arrive at your destination. [Speaker 1] Right, you're just running on fumes at that point. [Speaker 2] Exactly. So you approach the front desk of your hotel, you confirm your reservation for a fully accessible room, you grab your key card, and you ride the elevator up. You swipe the card, push open the door, and the bed in front of you is 30 inches off the ground. [Speaker 3] Oh, wow. Yeah. [Speaker 2] And for a wheelchair user, that 30-inch mattress might as well be glued to the ceiling. So today, we're really tearing down this pervasive myth of the ADA checklist, and we're completely redefining what travel actually looks like for real bodies. [Speaker 1] It's such a phenomenal topic, to be honest, because it forces us to really re-examine the built environment that we interact with every single day. I mean, most people just assume that if a space is legally compliant, it's functionally usable. [Speaker 2] Right, which makes total sense on the surface. [Speaker 1] Right. But what we're going to explore today is how architectural compliance routinely, and I mean routinely, fails human reality. And more importantly, we're looking at how travelers and certain segments of the travel industry are radically adapting to those failures. [Speaker 2] Yeah. Okay, let's unpack this, because the mission of today's deep dive is to go through this incredibly rich, just eye-opening stack of material from the Living the Good Life series. [Speaker 1] It's a fantastic series. [Speaker 2] It really is. The sources we have in front of us are this massive collection of highly detailed travel logs, hotel accessibility audits, remote expedition reviews. I mean, we are going to be tracking journeys that stretch from the ancient bicycle-choked cobblestones of Amsterdam all the way to the rugged Alaskan wilderness, and even into the massive inland seas of the American Great Lakes. [Speaker 1] Yeah, it's a huge geographical spread. [Speaker 2] Totally. But we aren't just looking at tourist hotspots here. We're looking at how people explore the world when they are navigating what our sources refer to as body disruptions, which, by the way, I think is just a brilliant umbrella term. [Speaker 1] It really is. It covers physical disabilities, chronic illnesses, mobility limitations, neurodivergence. It's very inclusive. [Speaker 2] Exactly. We're looking at how people travel at a pace that honors their actual bodies, rather than just constantly fighting against them. [Speaker 1] What's fascinating here is that this material operates as so much more than just a set of travel itineraries. It's really this profound exploration of geography, of human empathy, and the hidden mechanical layers of accessibility that most travelers never even realize exist. It challenges the very baseline of what makes a physical space welcoming. Because, as you pointed out with that hotel room example right at the start, a space can legally invite you in while simultaneously putting up physical barricades to your actual comfort. [Speaker 2] Right. Before we can embark on these grand sweeping adventures to the Alaskan wilderness or whatever, we have to look at the absolute baseline of travel, because the foundation of any trip anywhere on Earth is a hotel room. [Speaker 1] 100%. [Speaker 2] If you cannot rest safely, if you can't use the bathroom safely, if you just cannot recharge your physical and mental batteries, the destination outside that room honestly doesn't matter. The museum could be spectacular, but if your launch pad is compromised, you never get off the ground. [Speaker 1] That's a really crucial framing. The hotel room is the foundational infrastructure of travel. And our sources reveal this massive, just pervasive blind spot in the modern travel industry, which is the deeply ingrained idea that ADA, the Americans with Disabilities Act, that ADA compliance is synonymous with comfort or even true functional accessibility. [Speaker 2] And they're not the same thing. [Speaker 1] Not even close. [Speaker 2] This totally blew my mind as I was reading through the audits, because I think, like a lot of people, I just assumed ADA regulations were this comprehensive safety net, like they had it all figured out. [Speaker 1] Yeah, that's the common assumption. [Speaker 2] But the sources make it crystal clear that ADA compliance is merely the legal minimum. It is a rigid architectural checklist. It's a set of measurements. It is absolutely not a guarantee that a specific room will actually work for a unique human being navigating a specific body disruption. [Speaker 1] Right. And if we connect this to the bigger picture, the ADA requires structural modifications, right? Like widened doorways to accommodate the width of a standard wheelchair or the installation of grab bars near toilets, visual alarm systems for the hearing impaired. And those are vital. [Speaker 2] Oh, absolutely vital. [Speaker 1] They're legally mandated baselines, but the law doesn't aggressively regulate the nuanced functional details of living. Like it dictates the width of the door, but it doesn't necessarily dictate the specific layout of the furniture once you actually get through that door. [Speaker 2] And that is exactly where the concept of compliance falls completely apart in the real world. Let's go back to that 30 inch bed example. You know, you might look at a high bed and think, oh, that feels luxurious, like sleeping on a cloud or whatever. [Speaker 1] Sure. [Speaker 2] But break down the actual physical mechanics for us. Why is a 30 inch bed in an ADA room such a catastrophic failure in design? [Speaker 1] It really just comes down to basic biomechanics and physics. So a standard manual or power wheelchair seat typically sits about, let's say, 19 to 20 inches off the ground. [Speaker 2] OK. [Speaker 1] If an individual with limited or zero lower body mobility needs to get out of that chair and into bed, they have to perform a lateral transfer. They're relying entirely on upper body strength, leverage and momentum to slide from the chair to the mattress. Now, if the bed is relatively level with the chair, say 20 to 22 inches high, that transfer is a horizontal movement. It's manageable. But if the bed is 30 inches high, you're suddenly demanding that this person perform an uphill pivot transfer. [Speaker 2] So they're having to lift their entire body weight, essentially dead weight, like 10 or 11 vertical inches using nothing but shoulder leverage. [Speaker 1] Precisely. Biomechanically, it's an impossible ask for a lot of people. The bed becomes a literal wall. The room is legally compliant because the door was wide enough to let the chair in. But the user is fundamentally trapped in their chair because they can't get into the bed. Wow. Yeah. So the hotel checked the legal box, but they completely failed the human being. [Speaker 2] And the sources outline a whole catalog of these hidden hazards. Like they talk about the roll-in shower that has a surprise three inch lip at the entrance to keep the water in. [Speaker 1] Oh, that's a classic one. [Speaker 2] Right. And to a walking guest, a three inch lip is basically invisible. You just step right over it without thinking. But think about the front casters on a wheelchair. Those really small wheels at the front. A three inch lip stops them dead. [Speaker 1] It acts like a parking block. [Speaker 2] Exactly. A three inch lip is not a roll-in shower. It's a barricade that requires you to pop a wheelie over wet tile, which is incredibly dangerous. [Speaker 1] Or consider the equipment that's actually provided. The sources detail this all too common scenario of the wobbly, unstable plastic shower chair that a hotel just sort of tosses into the back of a closet. [Speaker 2] Oh, yeah. The flimsy ones. [Speaker 1] Yeah. It isn't anchored to the wall. It isn't medically rated. It's just a cheap plastic stool sitting on slippery, soapy tile. I mean, that isn't accessibility. That's just a massive liability waiting to happen. [Speaker 2] My personal favorite, and by favorite, I mean, the one that made me want to pull my hair out was the thermostat. [Speaker 1] Oh, right. [Speaker 2] The sources described this fully certified, supposedly wheelchair accessible room where the thermostat to control the air conditioning was placed six feet up the wall. Which is just, it's absurd. It is. If you're sitting in a chair, you literally cannot reach it. You are trapped in a room where you have zero autonomy over your own environment. Or the people on the door, also drilled in at six feet high, you hear a knock and you have absolutely no way of verifying who is standing on the other side of your door. [Speaker 1] It just highlights a profound disconnect between the architects who are drafting the blueprints and the actual end users experiencing the space. I mean, the architect drew a box that said door, but they didn't think about the sight lines of the person opening it. And this unpredictability, this constant friction of arriving at a hotel and wondering which crucial element is going to be wildly misconfigured is exactly why the sources pivot to a really surprising defense of mid-scale chain hotels. Specifically, they highlight brands like the Holiday Inn Express. [Speaker 2] See, I really have to push back on this a bit because I have always viewed those massive standardized chains as just painfully bland. [Speaker 1] A lot of people do. [Speaker 2] Right. Because if you're traveling to, say, a vibrant historic city, isn't staying in a copy-pasted room across 2000 identical locations, just sacrificing the magic of travel. You're trading the cultural immersion of a cool local boutique hotel for a beige box that looks exactly the same whether you're in Ohio or Florida. You're trading wonder for boredom. [Speaker 1] From the perspective of a traveler without a body disruption, your critique is entirely valid. It is a sacrifice of local flavor. But this raises a really important question that the sources bring up. What is the psychological and physical cost of a surprise? [Speaker 2] The cost of a surprise. [Speaker 1] Yes. Because for a traveler navigating chronic fatigue or a visual impairment or neurodivergence, a charming boutique hotel often translates directly into a maze of exhausting, unpredictable variables. [Speaker 2] Okay. I see where you're going with this. [Speaker 1] Yeah. Unpredictability drains energy. Predictability, on the other hand, is accessibility. When a traveler with these specific needs walks into a standardized chain hotel, the layout is a known quantity. They instantly know that the bathroom door slides to the left. They know the bed is uniformly 22 inches high. And they know the light switch is exactly where their hand expects it to be on the wall. [Speaker 2] So they don't have to solve the spatial puzzle of a new room. [Speaker 1] Exactly. Every single ounce of mental bandwidth and physical energy you save by not having to hunt for an outlet or rearrange furniture to make your chair fit or figure out some bizarrely designed modern shower. That is energy you can bank and spend on actually enjoying the vacation the next day. [Speaker 2] That makes so much sense. It's all about cognitive load. If you're already burning massive amounts of energy just navigating an airport or a new city in a body that requires constant management, the last thing you want is for your bedroom to be an escape room puzzle. You need it to be a frictionless environment. [Speaker 1] And the sources share this brilliant historical anecdote about Ray Charles that perfectly illustrates this exact dynamic. [Speaker 2] Yes. I loved this detail. Because Ray Charles, one of the most famous musicians in the world, could have afforded to stay in literally any luxury penthouse on the planet. But he famously favored staying at holiday inns, particularly back when they were one of the very first chains to aggressively enforce identical standardized room layouts across all their properties. [Speaker 1] Because for a traveler with total blindness, that standardization was the ultimate luxury. He could walk into a holiday in Seattle or a holiday in Miami, and his mental map of the room was instantly flawlessly accurate. [Speaker 2] Right. He wasn't stressing about tripping over a randomly placed modernist coffee table. [Speaker 1] Exactly. Or feeling along unfamiliar walls just to find the bathroom door. The architecture was predictable, which meant his autonomy was guaranteed. [Speaker 2] It really reframes the idea of what luxury actually is. Luxury isn't always high thread count sheets. Sometimes luxury is simply the absence of friction. But the sources are also very pragmatic here. Even at a chain hotel, how do you guarantee you're actually getting that predictable, accessible room? They point out some serious red flag language to watch out for during the booking process. [Speaker 1] They absolutely stress that travelers cannot rely on vague adjectives. The primary advice is to demand nouns and numbers. [Speaker 2] Right. If you call a front desk to confirm your reservation, and you ask if the room is accessible, and the clerk says, oh yeah, it's pretty accessible, or it should be fine for a wheelchair, the sources say you need to hang up and run. [Speaker 1] Pretty accessible is hospitality speak for. The front door is wide, but good luck getting your chair close enough to the bathroom sink to actually wash your hands. A traveler with a body disruption cannot survive on pretty accessible. They need quantitative, verifiable data to ensure their safety. [Speaker 2] So you don't ask, is the bed okay? You have to ask, can you take a tape measure and tell me exactly how many inches high the top of the mattress is from the floor? You literally have to force the hotel to quantify their compliance. [Speaker 1] But even with rigorous pre-trip verification, the travel industry is chaotic, right? Rooms get double booked, pipes burst, miscommunications happen. So what do you do when you show up at midnight, exhausted, and the hotel has given your specifically required accessible room away? Or they try to put you in a room with a massive step up to the bathroom. [Speaker 2] This was a piece of advocacy in the sources that I think everyone, disabled or not, needs to know. They outline a specific legal protocol known in the industry as the ADA walk. [Speaker 1] It is a critical tool of self-advocacy. If a hotel cannot provide the specific disability accommodating room that you booked, confirmed, and paid for, they can't just shrug their shoulders and say, sorry, we're full. [Speaker 2] Right, they can't just kick you to the curb. [Speaker 1] No, it is their legal and financial responsibility to rebook you at a comparable nearby hotel that does have an accessible room available. And they must cover the cost of your transportation to get there. [Speaker 2] You really have to know your rights. You're not being a difficult guest or a Karen for demanding the basic foundational requirement of your stay. You are simply holding the corporation to a binding legal contract. [Speaker 1] And we really cannot discuss the foundation of accessible travel without addressing a massive, often completely invisible demographic that the sources shine a very bright light on. The caregivers. [Speaker 2] Yes, the spouses, the adult children, the partners, the dedicated nurses. Caregivers are fundamentally the human infrastructure that makes travel possible for countless people with severe body disruptions. Yet, as the sources point out, the travel industry almost never designed spaces with the caregiver in mind. They're basically an afterthought, if they're thought of at all. [Speaker 1] Think about the physical toll of caregiving in a space not designed for it. The sources highlight the critical need for lower beds, not just for the traveler transferring from a wheelchair, but for the caregiver. If a bed is too high or too low, a caregiver who has to physically assist with turning or lifting a partner is risking severe lumbar back strain. If the caregiver blows out their back on day two of a 14 day trip, the vacation is over. It becomes a medical emergency for both of them. [Speaker 2] And it isn't just the physical strain, right? It's the psychological space. If you're traveling as a caregiver, you are essentially on the clock 24 hours a day. [Speaker 1] Absolutely. [Speaker 2] The sources emphasize the need for rooms that offer separate sleeping spaces or even just a heavy curtain or a partial architectural divider. Caregivers need a basic sense of privacy to decompress, to read a book with a light on, to simply have a moment where they aren't visually monitoring their partner. [Speaker 1] Furthermore, they require logistical proximity. An accessible room should ideally be located close to the elevator banks. Why? Because it's often the caregiver who is making multiple trips to haul heavy medical equipment or making quick runs to get ice for medications or pushing a manual chair. [Speaker 2] Right. If you stick the accessible room at the very end of a quarter mile long carpeted hallway, you are taxing the caregiver's physical endurance before they even get to the lobby. [Speaker 1] Exactly. [Speaker 2] So if we conclude that land-based architecture, no matter how many ADA laws we pass or how rigorously we measure the beds, will always have these unpredictable friction points from narrow doorways to exhausted caregivers, what's the solution? How do we bypass the friction of the land entirely? [Speaker 1] The answer the sources provide is fundamentally a geographical workaround. If the land is hostile, you bypass the land. You take the hotel with you. [Speaker 2] Which brings us to the second major revelation of this deep dive, the floating resort, cruising as the ultimate adaptive travel hack. [Speaker 1] It represents a total paradigm shift in how we approach accessible travel. [Speaker 2] Now, I have to be completely honest here. Before reading these sources, I had a massive, deeply ingrained prejudice against the cruise industry. [Speaker 1] A lot of people do, yeah. [Speaker 2] I always pictured it as the absolute worst aspects of mass tourism. Like thousands of people fighting over buffet shrimp, forced bingo games by the pool, overwhelming noise, and just a general feeling of being trapped in a floating shopping mall. I completely wrote it off as unauthentic travel. [Speaker 1] That is a very common perception, especially among travelers who prioritize rugged, independent exploration. But when you look at cruising through the lens of body disruptions, the narrative flips entirely. The sources argue that a modern cruise ship is structurally the most enabling environment on the planet. [Speaker 2] And they back it up with some incredibly compelling architectural evidence. The term they use that really stuck with me is the zero trip environment. [Speaker 1] It's a great term. [Speaker 2] If you're a full-time power chair user, or someone with cerebral palsy, or even just someone who is six weeks out from a knee replacement surgery, terrain is your absolute biggest enemy. On land, you're constantly battling curbs, potholes, tree roots, pushing up sidewalks, steps into restaurants. [Speaker 1] But a cruise ship is an engineered bubble of accessibility. There are no curbs on a ship. Ramps aren't these hastily added wooden structures in a back alley. They are gently graded, seamlessly integrated parts of the deck design. Hallways are wide and perfectly flat. Doors to public spaces are universally automatic. [Speaker 3] Wow, yeah. [Speaker 1] And crucially, there are massive vertical elevator banks located at the forward, midship, and aft sections of the vessel. You can traverse a city-sized structure for 14 days and completely bypass a single set of stairs. [Speaker 2] But I still wrestled with the psychological aspect of it when reading this. Let's say we dock in a beautiful Mediterranean port. Everyone rushes off the ship to go ziplining or take a grueling walking tour of ancient ruins. But my body is just done. I've hit a wall, my pain levels are spiking, and I physically cannot leave the ship. What about the FOMO? The fear of missing out? If I have to stay behind, aren't I just trapped in a floating hotel room while everyone else is experiencing the world? [Speaker 1] This is exactly where the sources introduce the concept of energy autonomy. And it is a brilliant psychological reframing. Let's compare the land to the sea. If you're staying at a land-based resort in Cancun and you have a flare-up of chronic fatigue, you have to stay in your room while your family goes down to the beach. You're lying in bed staring at a drywall ceiling. You are entirely removed from the experience of travel. [Speaker 2] Right, you feel like a burden and you feel isolated. [Speaker 1] But on a cruise ship, your room is the experience. If you need to rest, you don't feel like you're missing the destination because the destination is moving past your window. You can lie in your bed, open the balcony door, feel the sea breeze, and watch the ocean, the fjords of the islands slog by. You're still actively participating in the journey, but you're doing it entirely on your body's terms, without expending a single calorie of energy. [Speaker 2] It's literally a built-in escape hatch that travels with you. Think about the logistics. If you're in a crowded city and you suddenly get overwhelmed, whether it's pain or sensory overload, you have to figure out how to escape. You have to find a bench, call an Uber, wait on a busy curb, navigate foreign traffic, and finally get back to your hotel. It is an exhausting process just to find relief. [Speaker 1] It really is. [Speaker 2] On a ship, you can go down to a massive, loud, Broadway-style show in the main theater. You can push your boundaries and participate in the fun. But the moment the lights or the crowd become too much, a dark, quiet, safe room containing your own bed and your own medications is literally a five-minute frictionless elevator ride away. You never have to negotiate with a foreign transit system to find your sanctuary. [Speaker 1] And that concept of sanctuary extends far beyond just having a quiet bedroom. What is truly fascinating here is the unseen medical infrastructure of these modern ships. [Speaker 2] This was wild to me. [Speaker 1] For travelers navigating severe chronic conditions, or even individuals with terminal illnesses who are looking to take one last meaningful trip with their families, the idea of being hours away from a major hospital is paralyzing. It creates a baseline of anxiety that ruins the trip. [Speaker 2] Because if something goes wrong on a walking tour in a small village, you're reliant on a rural clinic that might not speak your language or have your medical history. [Speaker 1] Exactly. But modern cruise ships are designed as floating cities, which means they require city-level services. Down on the lower decks, usually hidden from the general passenger areas, these ships have incredibly advanced medical centers. [Speaker 2] And we are not talking about a school nurse's office with a first aid kit, some aspirin, and a cot. [Speaker 1] Far from it. We are talking about highly sophisticated mini-hospitals. They're equipped with ICU-level stabilization gear, defibrillators, advanced cardiac monitors, full x-ray machines, and pharmacies. They're staffed by international teams of doctors and nurses who live on board. They even coordinate with specialized third-party medical companies. For example, there is a company called Dialysis at Sea that brings nephrologists and dialysis machines on board specific sailings, allowing patients with end-stage renal disease to receive life-sustaining blood-filtering treatments while they cruise the Caribbean. [Speaker 2] That is staggering. The sources even note a detail that is objectively grim. But for some travelers, it represents the ultimate realistic relief. These massive ships are equipped with on-board morgues. Now, no one wants to think about that on vacation, obviously. But if you're traveling with a terminal diagnosis, the psychological safety of knowing that clinical intervention and dignified handling of the worst-case scenario is literally under your feet cannot be overstated. It completely down-regulates the nervous system's alarm bells. You can finally relax because the safety net is traveling with you. [Speaker 1] That down-regulation is key. And it isn't just about acute medical emergencies. For neurodivergent travelers or individuals prone to severe sensory overload, the cruise industry is actually pioneering some incredibly thoughtful accommodations. The sources highlight that several major cruise lines are now achieving certifications from organizations like Culture City. [Speaker 2] What does that actually look like in practice on a ship? Because ships are notoriously loud. [Speaker 1] It looks like intentionally designing environments for differing sensory bandwidths. Let's use an analogy. Imagine trying to tune a delicate radio to catch a faint signal, but someone is shining a massive strobe light in your eyes and blasting an air horn. Your brain's processing bandwidth is entirely consumed by filtering out the violent noise and light, leaving zero bandwidth for actually hearing the radio or enjoying the environment. That is what a standard casino or dining room feels like during sensory overload. [Speaker 2] Wow, that's a great way to put it. So to counter that, the ships are creating designated low-sensory zones. These are quiet lounges where background music is strictly banned, the harsh overhead lighting is significantly dimmed, and the crowds are controlled. It gives the brain a place to reset. They also offer sensory bags at guest services, which include things like noise-canceling headphones and strobe reduction glasses for people prone to visually triggered migraines or seizures. They're integrating closed captioning on all the screens and braille on the elevator buttons and cabin doors throughout the ship. [Speaker 1] They're also providing something profoundly important for certain medical conditions, which is climate control autonomy. [Speaker 2] Yes, this is a massive issue for travelers undergoing active cancer therapies or individuals dealing with severe thyroid imbalances or menopause. Their internal body temperatures can wildly, violently fluctuate from freezing to sweating in minutes. [Speaker 1] Oh, absolutely. [Speaker 2] If you're on a tour bus, you cannot force 40 other people to blast the AC just because you're having a hot flash. But on a ship, you have a digital thermostat in your cabin. You have total, undisputed control over your immediate environment. You can drop the temperature to 60 degrees if that is what your physiology demands in that moment. [Speaker 1] And we must mention the culinary infrastructure. For individuals with severe gastrointestinal disruptions, Crohn's disease, celiac disease, or life-threatening food allergies, traveling often devolves into what the sources call restaurant roulette. [Speaker 2] That is the perfect term for it. Trying to explain the absolute severity of a cross-contamination peanut allergy to a busy waiter in a foreign language is a terrifying, exhausting nightmare. You are gambling with your health at every meal. [Speaker 1] But on a cruise ship, the dining room operates on a pre-vetted system. When you book the cruise, you register your specific dietary customization with the accessibility department. When you sit down in the main dining room, the maitre d' and your dedicated wait staff already have a digital profile of your needs. [Speaker 2] That's so smart. [Speaker 1] Your food is prepared in a dedicated allergy-safe galley. It removes an enormous amount of daily friction and anxiety. You can actually enjoy the food instead of interrogating it. [Speaker 2] So we have thoroughly established that the cruise ship is the perfect, highly controlled, floating base camp. The architecture works. The medical safety nets are in place. The food is safe. But a base camp is useless if it doesn't go anywhere. Right. The destination absolutely matters. And this is where the sources throw us a massive curveball. [Speaker 1] We aren't going to the predictable Caribbean islands or the crowded ports of the Mediterranean. [Speaker 2] No. Instead, the sources take this floating base camp somewhere completely unexpected. [Speaker 1] A quick but important note. The information shared in this podcast is for general educational and entertainment purposes only. We love sharing our insights. But please remember, this content does not constitute medical, health or professional advice. Every body and every situation is unique. You should always consult with a qualified medical specialist or health care professional before starting any new program, making lifestyle changes, or acting on any information you hear today. Your health is your responsibility. So let's keep it safe. (Transcribed by TurboScribe. Go Unlimited to remove this message.) Show Notes

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Links to Referenced Resources

TSA Cares

Spoon Spending Chart

Living The Could Life - A 70-Day Workbook For Living Well After Body Change

Finding the Perfect Care Giver

Robert and Theresa — Tue, 18 Aug 2026 12:43:00 +0000

Who Will Care?

Finding the perfect caregiver for those with a new disability is no easy task. There is so much to be considered. Both the caregiver and the receiver have special needs.

In this episode, we offer a few suggestions for finding the perfect caregiver - one who understands the enormity of the job and who can commit to assisting.

The receiver of the assistance also needs to understand what a huge undertaking the caregiver assumes.

AS AN AMAZON ASSOCIATE I EARN FROM QUALIFYING PURCHASES.

Transcript

Click Here for Transcript Robert: Welcome back to Living the Could Life, where we explore real-world travel for real bodies, adventures that are meaningful, doable, and full of wonder. Today we're talking about something that doesn't get discussed enough, how to choose the right caregiver or the right care receiver before you commit to the partnership. Theresa: Because caregiving is a relationship, and like any relationship, it can thrive or it can fall apart if the fit isn't right. Robert: We're going to talk about expectations, boundaries, physical capability, emotional readiness, and what both people should add before saying yes. Theresa, you've seen this firsthand. What happens when the caregiver isn't the right match? Theresa: Well, a lot. And sometimes you just have a default caregiver, so you have to make it the right match. Right, Robert? Well, you have to make it work. Yeah, you've seen it too. Robert: Yeah, yeah. And sometimes you really have no choice and you just have to get through it. Theresa: Like, as in our case. Not quite. Well, but still, sometimes a caregiver, when you choose one, you have to be careful, just because maybe they're all excited and they have good intentions and they want to help you, but maybe they just don't understand what it takes. Say that you need to be, have transfers done, or a lot of physically demanding help. Robert: They just don't. Theresa: Right. They may not have the physical strength to do it. So, sometimes they could also have the wrong attitude, and those are definitely the people you don't want, because they can't be resentful, they have to be patient, and they cannot have a savior complex, because that just doesn't work out. It actually makes the person who is receiving the care feel not so wonderful. Robert: And the care receiver can feel unsafe, guilty, or even like a burden. Theresa: Exactly. The partnership ideally has to be balanced, respectful, and realistic, and that doesn't always come immediately. Robert: Let's talk about what a person needing care should ask before choosing a caregiver. Theresa: First, if you need transfers, mobility support, toileting assistance, those are not small tasks, so the person should be physically able to do what's required. And even if there aren't any of those highly physical tasks, I know if I fall down sometime, or trip, it's helpful to have somebody pick me up. Robert: Secondly, do they understand spoon theory? This is the theory of energy management, energy budgeting that we talked about earlier, because if they don't get the idea of energy budgeting, they'll push you past your limit. Theresa: Right, we're going to talk a little bit more about spoon theory later in this session, because we found it's something that really works, and it's practical. Third, do they communicate well? You need someone who listens, doesn't take things personally, and doesn't guilt trip you. Robert: Or, do they respect eponymy? A caregiver should support independence, not override it. Theresa: Exactly. And then finally, do they have the emotional bandwidth? Caregiving requires patience, flexibility, and resilience. And it's not just the care receiver who should ask, the caregiver also needs to ask some questions. Robert: Now, let's look at what should caregivers ask themselves? Theresa: First, this matches what the recipient should ask. If you want to be a caregiver, you need to ask, am I physically capable of this? If you can't safely lift, transfer, or support mobility, you shouldn't take the role. And of course, it depends on the person you are helping with caregiving. Robert: Second, do I have the right temperament? Caregiving is not for people to get easily frustrated or overwhelmed. Theresa: Third, do I understand the duties required? Things like ADLs, and that's activities of daily living, medication routines, travel, logistics. It's real work. Robert: Or, do I have enough spoons myself? Caregivers can burn out fast if they don't manage their own energy. Theresa: Right. And finally, can I communicate honestly? You need to be able to say, I need help. I'm tired, or I can't do this safely. Robert: Let's look at travel now. Travel adds a whole new layer. Theresa: Oh, that even for people without any kind of disability or body disruption. That's always true. Travel requires physical stamina, patience, problem solving, and the ability to adapt when things go sideways. Robert: Care receivers should ask, can this person handle airport stress? Can they manage mobility equipment? Do they stay calm when plans change? Can they advocate for me if I'm overwhelmed? Theresa: And caregivers should ask, can I manage transfers in unfamiliar environments? Can I handle long days with unpredictable spoon costs? Am I comfortable asking for help from airport or hotel staff? And do I understand accessibility needs well enough to plan ahead? Robert: Let's talk about red flags now. Theresa: For care receivers, the caregiver gets irritated easily. They minimize your disability. They ignore your spoon limits. They make you feel guilty. They don't follow instructions or they totally forget their duties or they're physically unable to help you safely. Robert: For caregivers, the care receiver expects you to be available 24-7. They don't communicate their needs. They refuse adaptive tools. They ignore your boundaries. They expect you to just know what they need. Theresa: And really, it is like a job. It's like going to an interview. I highly recommend, especially if we're going to travel, do a short day or even if you're not traveling, just spend a day with them at home and see what it's like. And if you can't do it, you would know from the start. And that works better for both people involved. Robert: That sounds like a good idea. It's kind of like we to do our chase downs or we'll be kicking lawns with ISIL students. And we take them out for a weekend or something to see if they could manage it, to see if we could manage them. You see they have the right equipment. So you could use the same idea. Theresa: Right. It is a learning experience and you don't have to necessarily be an expert the first day. I think whether you're on the receiving or the giving end, it's a new skill to learn and things change often. Robert: OK, let's talk about Swoon Theory again, but this time from a psychological angle. Theresa: Swoon Theory isn't just about physical energy. It's about predictability. People with disabilities often live with unpredictable bodies. Pain spikes, hot flashes, waves of fatigue, sensory overload. Spoons give structure to something that feels chaotic. Robert: And caregivers need to understand at spoon level, our moral judgment. You're not lacing us. Theresa: Spoon Theory helps caregivers avoid pushing someone past their limits. And that's the same for the care receiver, too. The caregiver also has a certain number of spoons. It also helps care receivers communicate without guilt. Saying I'm out of spoons is a boundary. It's not a failure. Robert: There's also a psychological safety component. When both people use Swoon Theory, it reduces misunderstanding. Theresa: Right. Because instead of arguing about why someone can't do something, you're acknowledging the reality of their energy budget. Robert: Let's talk about expectations. What psychological traits matter in a care partnership? Theresa: For care receivers, you need someone who listens, someone who doesn't take things personally, someone who doesn't guilt trip you, someone who respects your autonomy, and someone who can regulate their own emotion. And for caregivers, you need a care receiver who communicates clearly, who tells you what they need, who doesn't expect you to read their mind, and who respects your boundaries, too. And I think you need to keep personalities in mind. Just because somebody needs care or you want to be a caregiver, it doesn't mean that you will get along or that both of you are nice people. It's something to take into consideration. Caregiving is not a place for passive-aggressive behavior, martyrdom, or silent resentment. Those things will quickly destroy any partnership you have. Robert: Let's talk about misunderstandings. They happen. How do you resolve them? Theresa: First, if you've thoroughly evaluated each other and have come to acceptable terms, you should be able to assume that you both have good intent. Most conflicts come from miscommunication, not malice. Robert: Second, use I-statements. I feel rushed when I need more time to... I'm overwhelmed when... Theresa: And third, back to the spoons. Check the spoon levels of both people before discussing anything emotional. If either person is out of spoons, the conversation will go badly. Or, clarify duties. Robert: A lot of conflicts come from mismatched expectations. Theresa: And fifth, schedule check-ins. Once a week, sit down and ask, What's working? What's not? What needs to be adjusted? And what do we need more support with? Care partnerships thrive when communication is proactive and not reactive. And keep in mind, you may have more than one caregiver. And the same if you are a caregiver. Maybe you care for other people a few days a week or once a month or you just help out. Let's give our listeners some best practices. For care receivers, be honest about your needs. You can't expect your caregiver to magically know what you need. And I think that's especially true with people who have invisible disabilities. Don't minimize your disability. And don't push yourself to make the caregiver comfortable. Although, on the other hand, if you've talked this out, you shouldn't push your caregiver either. Respect your boundaries and their boundaries. And communicate spoon levels early in the day. Robert: For caregivers, learn the person's patterns. Ask before helping. Don't assume. Keep instructions simple and calm. Don't rush. Take breaks. Advocate when needed, but don't override the timing. Theresa: And for both, it's helpful to build routines. Celebrate even small wins. Laugh together. Take rest without feeling guilty. And remember that you are a team. Robert: Your relationships are care partnerships. Succeed when both people choose each other intentionally. Communicate honestly. And respect each other's limits. Theresa: And when misunderstandings happen, as they always do, you resolve them with compassion, clarity, and a shared understanding of spoon limits. Robert: Thanks for joining us for our discussion of caregiving. We'll see you next time. Theresa: And next time, we will be delving into traveling with a caregiver and go more into hopeful tips for doing that. See you next week. (Transcribed by TurboScribe. Go Unlimited to remove this message.) Show Notes

Music

Links to Referenced Resources

TSA Cares

Spoon Spending Chart

Living The Could Life - A 70-Day Workbook For Living Well After Body Change

Caretaking for the Newly Disabled

Robert and Theresa — Tue, 11 Aug 2026 13:15:50 +0000

Who Cares?

When disruption affects your body, you may need some times for caretaking for the newly disabled. It's not always the easiest especially if you were independent prior to the bodily change. What does the caretaker need to know? How can they effectively assist you?

What do you need to do to help them assist you? It all depends. We briefly look at some of the situations that you may not have thought of. A sympathetic and trusted caretaker can make your recovery or adaption less stressful.

AS AN AMAZON ASSOCIATE I EARN FROM QUALIFYING PURCHASES.

Transcript

Click Here for Transcript Robert: Welcome back to Living the Good Life, where we explore real-world travel for real bodies. Adventures that are meaningful, doable, and full of wonder. I'm Robert. Theresa: And I'm Theresa. Today, we're diving into a topic that affects millions of families but often doesn't get nearly enough airtime, and that is caregiving for someone who's recently become disabled. Robert: Whether the disability comes from an accident, an illness, or a sudden change in mobility, the early months are intense for the person adapting and for the caregiver learning a whole new world. Theresa: So today, we're going to talk about that. I think we're both experts on the subject, at least for my type of disability, which is a hidden one, but we will talk about practical stuff like ADLs, which are activities of daily living, and also the emotional and logistical challenges. And that includes for travel because that's what we are concentrating on. And yes, we will absolutely talk about spoon theory, which is something we learned about researching for this podcast. First, I think it was personal care. I had to look at everything carefully. I have been pretty independent, traveled solo a lot of my life, and assume that I could still travel without a caregiver. That pretty much was a disaster. And it's not good when you have flight changes or you can't see well enough to see if your flight has changed or where the gate is. Fortunately, when that happened, I did have the app, but I just wanted to reconfirm so they didn't have to walk all the way to a gate that might be the correct gate. Because walking through an airport is like walking through an obstacle course. There's too many people. There's too many distractions. It's hard to see. Because I have an invisible disability, people don't see. They don't see me from behind. I don't believe one of those times that I was wearing an eye patch because I thought that was only for driving. And I guess that's true because that's true because I was on a group tour and people asked others why it was taking so long to walk on ice or why it was so slow. And that's because I had to check out everything because I don't have depth perception. I don't have peripheral vision. So then that's when Robert became my caregiver and I'm lucky to have somebody who helps me. I had to change routines. You know, he reminded me to put my glasses on when I was going out or grab a patch. He also had to understand my ADLs. Now everything takes me at least twice as long getting dressed, brushing my teeth, using the bathroom, going outside. All of that took extra time. Robert: And these are the ADLs Theresa's talking about. Things like bathing, dressing, eating, toileting, transferring and mobility. Theresa: And fortunately for me, a lot of those things I can do myself with extra time. I don't cook anymore. I turn on the wrong burner and I'm afraid of burning the house down. I don't use knives. Robert: Yes, you definitely don't use knives. Theresa: No, but sometimes I've cheated if I'm really careful. Because when you're not here, but I cut a piece of cheese and that's about it. And I'm very, very careful and it's scary. But for me, I didn't grow up with this vision loss. And when it happens suddenly, you're not independent anymore. You can't drive anymore. You can't do anything. You figure out how you want to get help. But on the same hand, for me, because I've been dependent, I feel ashamed of my disability and guilty having to ask people for help because it's so opposite of how I lived before. And I guess part of that is, do I need equipment? And I did get a cane because I have no depth perception. Stairs are very difficult. They can look just like a boardwalk and a boardwalk can look like stairs. And then I can get, you know, I'm suddenly frightened in out of it. I have to decide what's safe. I have to preserve dignity. And even though my disability is mostly invisible, when I wear a patch, people stare, look at me funny. I know one time there was maybe, I'd say, a 12 or 13 year old just staring at me as he walked out into the parking lot from a store, which I don't usually go to anymore. But he crashed into a light pole. And because I'm mean, I guess I thought, that's what he gets. Like, don't stare at me. And at least I'm outside. Robert: And then there are the rude people who will pass by and say, Arrrrgh. Theresa: Oh yeah. I've had, because I wear a patch, but for me, the thing to do is say, hey, matey. And don't let them, I mean, I would never consider saying that to somebody unless it was an actual pirate that I would run. But yeah, sometimes there's new things I had to get used to. Robert: And there's been a huge emotional adjustment for both of us. And that's true for both the caregiver and the person who has that sudden body disruption. Theresa: Yeah, definitely is, like I said, I didn't think I needed anyone to take care of me and it makes me feel guilty and dependent, which I just don't like that. Like I said, I'm very lucky because Robert has taken care of me and he's really good. I think if you don't have the disability, sometimes it's hard to understand. Like even for me, without being able to see, there's things I have to look at everything now and it's exhausting. So Robert tries to model and pretend that he can't see either. So he knows what might be hazardous to me. And it can be exhausting for a caregiver as well, because it's just a totally different way of living. Robert: And that exhaustion can lead us right into spoon theory and energy management. So let's talk about spoon theory. It's one of the most helpful frameworks for understanding energy limits. Theresa: And we found out about this while researching topics for this. I had never heard of spoon theory until a month ago, and it really does make sense. We did another podcast totally on spoon theory, so you might want to go back and check that out. That theory came from Christine Miserandino, who has a disability and she was trying to explain to a friend how much energy it took. So the idea is pretty simple. You imagine you start each day with a limited number of spoons, but everything you do, whether it's big or small, costs you a spoon. When you run out, you're done. And that doesn't matter on how much you want to keep going. And that's something very difficult, I think, for many, especially if you were active. I mean, I used to ride my bike and I know it's not a long distance, but I used to ride my bike just as a workout, ride it hard 10 miles a day. Hard for me now would be to pedal once and hope I didn't run into a tree or something so I could still actually pedal a bike. But I can't see where I'm going. That makes it difficult and that takes up lots of energy. So no sentry rides for me anymore. Robert: And that's certainly true for someone who's recently disabled. Their spoons may be drastically fewer than they had before. Theresa: And the same thing is true for somebody going through cancer treatments like Robert. And he always thinks he has the energy of a 20 year old anyway. Robert: But I feel like I'm 19. Theresa: Oh, you're down to 19 now? Robert: Yeah, yeah. But I had my radiation treatment and some other therapies. And one of the side effects of all that was extreme fatigue. And it wasn't just for a few days, it's it can be for months or even years for some people. And I think I'm slowly starting to get out of it now. But I really do wake up in the morning with a limited number of spoons. And if I push myself too hard during the day and I'm starting to borrow spoons from the next day, I'm going to crash that next day. And it's going to take me a longer time to recover. Theresa: And that's true when you think you can keep going because you have to remember you have a limited number of spoons, no matter how many you had in the past and could go on and on and on. You really have to evaluate your personal situation. And you could run out of spoons just by getting up and taking a shower. And those things, when you change, instead of taking one spoon, as in the past, they could now take three spoons and getting dressed might cost two spoons. I know for me, getting dressed, I used to be one who could be ready for the day in about five minutes. Now I'd say it's 15 or 20. I have to see if I'm looking at a pair of pants or a shirt. That's something that I could work on. But I haven't gotten to that point, you know, to put shirts over here and the different colors and be better about sorting it out. And then going to the doctor's, that's not fun, interferes with Robert's schedule. So there's another reason to feel guilty that, you know, I'm cutting in to his day when we're both low on spoons. We make it work out. Robert: And you have to be considerate. So instead of saying something like, let's run some errands after your appointment, you should be asking, will you have spoons left for running some errands? Theresa: And I usually like stopping and running errands. Sometimes I'm pretty good at doing it. It depends on what the errand is. I often find myself just sitting in the car while Robert goes into the grocery store. I think it's probably saved us a lot of money because I'm one who likes to look at the clearance rack or look at a different kind of food or think of something different for dinner. It's difficult navigating the store if I do go, which occasionally I do just to do something. I hold on to the cart. Sometimes Robert will park me somewhere. I have to say, even if I'm parked in a corner, invariably there's somebody coming right at me and it's like, I'm out of the way. You know, I'm like, give me a dirty look. It's like, but I moved way over. You know, it's like if I pulled off the side of the road, they still want to come and crash into me. But I think there is some psychological thing about crashing into things or those things attracting you. And then because of my disability, or I actually am not disabled, so maybe I'm one of those fake people, I am impaired, which I can't drive. I have no independence, but until I'm almost totally blind, I am not considered disabled. But I've been watching a lot of people with disabilities who said, if you think you're disabled, you are. I mean, you know yourself best. And I would I don't know who comes up with requirements, but I would like them to see if they'd still consider this an impairment if they experience the same. But I guess it's neither here nor there. But that means if we park far away, I have more chances of getting hit by a car I didn't see. That happens whether you can see or not. Parking lots can be crazy, but I cannot get the little blue tag that you put on your car to park close to the store. Maybe somebody will come up with impairment parking spots and I'd be the only one who had the tag. Robert: Let's go deeper into ADLs. What does supporting ADLs look like day to day? Theresa: It's a mix of routine and flexibility. For example, maybe bathing or showering requires grab bars, which we have all of them ready to be installed in our house or a handheld showerhead. If you've listened before, you know, we recently built a house during part of that is when I lost all my vision. So we've made some adjustments. We have a shower with a handheld and a rain shower in it. The bathroom's made to fit a wheelchair if that's ever necessary. Robert: All of our doors are now wide enough. They're 36 inch doors. Theresa: Right. All of our doors are 36 inch doors. And we just plan that just in case, hoping we never need to use some of the things like a grab bar. A shower is good for anybody, whether you have a disability or not. Robert: And we have the curbless shower, too, so there's no step up. Theresa: Right. And we have, you know, those really tall bathtubs look really nice, but I'm a shorter person getting in and out of them is not fun. Oh, so, you know, maybe if you have other disabilities, say you can't use your hands very well, you might need adaptive clothing or magnetic closures, wide leg pants, slip on shoes. And I think there's a lot more that can be done with things like adaptable clothing. Robert: One of the ADLs could be transferring, and that's moving from bed to wheelchair or wheelchair to car. And it often requires a safe, manageable technique. Theresa: Right. And you don't automatically learn that. You have to practice and see how the person that you're helping feels and what works best for them. And caregivers, they learn safe transfer methods, but it's a technique. And I honestly don't know if there's anybody who provides maybe an occupational therapist. I'm not sure. I'll have to check out to see if they'll come to your house and give you instructions on how to best transfer. Robert: And these mobility opportunities help to support autonomy and that independence looks different for everyone. Theresa: Right. And independence does look different for everybody. And some people will think, oh, you know, if you're in a wheelchair, you can't walk, but maybe you can. Maybe you can only walk a certain distance or maybe you need to take rest breaks. You know, you may be able to walk so far without your wheelchair or with a cane or with somebody holding on to you like Robert always holds my hand when we walk. Sometimes I think I might look like a hostage when he grabs my arm, but nobody's called the police yet. Back to what we're talking about, sometimes brushing your teeth is difficult because of the height of the sink or how far you have to reach to turn on the faucet. Maybe holding the toothbrush is difficult. So there's a lot of things that you have to consider and people want to maximize what they can do. Robert: And you want to try and minimize burnout for the caregiver. Theresa: Right. Because caregivers have their spoon limits, too. Robert: Let's talk about travel logistics. Travel is a huge topic. When someone becomes disabled, travel can feel impossible, but it doesn't have to. Theresa: Right. Not at all. It just requires a lot of planning, flexibility, patience and often a sense of humor. Robert: Let's break it down. What's the first step? Theresa: Well, first step is assessing needs. Do you need mobility aids, medications, bathroom access, rest breaks and your energy level? You know, are you sensitive to sounds or temperature? You should all write that down before planning. You're actually building a separate travel version of your ADLs. Robert: And transportation? Theresa: If you're driving, you may already know how to transfer safely. If I know that there's accessible parking and how long you can sit comfortably. If you're flying, you're dealing with TSA, boarding assistants, aisle chairs, accessible seating, pre-boarding. Be sure when you book your ticket to go to the airline's website and request any special equipment or assistance that you need. Like I always get the wheelchair just for my safety. Robert: Hotels are another big one. Theresa: Accessible room that can be just that it meets a minimal ADA compliance. Which could be there's a grab bar in the extra high tub or there's one near the toilet. So we talked about some of these before. Think ahead. About what you need specifically and call the hotel. And I can tell you that a lot of people who work at hotels, they have not been in every room. And there are some hotels, we'll say like the Grand Hotel, Mackinac Island. We were at the Ritz Carlton in Cleveland. Every room is different. So if you have a specific style room, just ask if they can check and verify, maybe even send you photos. So some of the other things you can ask, is the shower a roll in or a step in? Does it have a chair? Are the beds at standard height? Is there enough room to maneuver your wheelchair and store it? Are the doorways wide enough? Robert: And then there's pacing. Theresa: Travel days require spoon budgeting for sure. Everybody knows that travel is not easy. Although I've heard of people who've traveled millions of times, they've never had a delayed or canceled flight, which amazes me. It's better to be prepared. So build in some rest time, stay flexible and be happy with the small wins, like finding a great accessible place to eat or navigating a new city without stress. Robert: Travel becomes slower, but richer. Theresa: Exactly. It's all about presence, not speed. As a formal fear of missing out person, or maybe I still am, but I can't do that anymore, it's been difficult to cut my itinerary in half or take a rest or just say I've run out of spoons and, you know, go get a rest. Robert: Now let's talk about the emotional side for both people. Theresa: Caregivers often feel guilt, exhaustion or fear of messing up, as do the person being cared for and who can feel grief, frustration or loss of independence. Spoon theory helps, but you still need to remember that communication is everything. Robert: And humor. Theresa: Yes, sometimes laughing together can be the best medicine. And so celebrating progress, no matter how small, even looking at what you did accomplish. Robert: If you're a caregiver for someone who's recently disabled, you're doing one of the hardest and most meaningful jobs in the world. Theresa: Exactly. It's so difficult. And if you're adapting to a new disability, your resilience is extraordinary. Not by choice, but just by if you want to keep living, you have to learn to be resilient and flexible, which is easier said than done. You're learning a new body, a new rhythm and a new way of moving around the world. Robert: Ideals, spoon theory, travel logistics, travel logistics, they're tools, they're tools. But the heart of caregiving is partnership. Theresa: And a partnership is built one day, one spoon and one victory at a time. I've added a caregiver checklist in the show notes. And next time, we're going to talk about how to choose a caregiver and also how to know if you want to be a caregiver for somebody. Robert: Thanks for joining us on Living the Good Life. We'll see you next time. We'll see you next time. (Transcribed by TurboScribe. Go Unlimited to remove this message.) Show Notes

Music

Links to Referenced Resources

TSA Cares

Spoon Spending Chart

Living The Could Life - A 70-Day Workbook For Living Well After Body Change

Cruising is the Best Vacation for the Disability Community

Robert and Theresa — Tue, 04 Aug 2026 13:19:22 +0000

20 Reasons Why Cruising is a the best vacation for those within the disability community

In this episode we continue our exploration of the advantages of vacationing by cruise ship. Those with disabilities will appreciate the benefits of traveling in a way that reduces stress, and eliminates changing hotels and dealing with learning new surroundings every day.

We share the last of the 20 reasons that show why if you are cruising with body disruptions and disability that this is definitely a choice that you should consider when making your vacation plans.

AS AN AMAZON ASSOCIATE I EARN FROM QUALIFYING PURCHASES.

Transcript

Click Here for Transcript Theresa:Welcome back to Living the good Life. Today we are going to continue our discussion about why cruising is so wonderful for people with body disruptions. Hope you enjoyed the show. Robert: Let's talk about that worst-case scenario. What if it's more than just a flare-up? What if someone actually needs clinical intervention? That's reason number nine. Onboard advanced medical centers. These are not first aid stations with band-aids and ice packs. Modern cruise ships have literal mini hospitals on the lower decks. They are staffed by international doctors and nurses, equipped with ICU level stabilization gear, x-ray machines, lab equipment for blood work, and cardiac monitors. If you have a chronic illness, knowing that life-saving medical care is literally under your feet, provides a level of psychological safety you cannot get at a remote beach resort. Theresa: Having said that, do be aware that these are not full hospitals, and you should always consult with a doctor before if you have a chronic condition, or especially if you have a terminal condition. There are people who want to do one last hurrah before, I guess, their expiration date comes up, like the next week, and they need to be evacuated from the ship. And I can tell you that does not always make your fellow passengers thrilled. So please don't put the other 3,000 or 6,000 or 900 passengers in a position they don't want to be in. Just so you know, just in case you do have an accident or something serious happen, because it can happen at any time, there is a morgue on the ship, and they will take care of you. Which, at that point, you probably don't really know. It does completely lower your nervous system alarm bells to know that you have an option for medical care. And speaking of comfort, let's add reason 10. Climate control autonomy. Many people undergoing cancer treatments or dealing with thyroid disruptions. Oh, do I get to add that to my list too? Great. They can experience extreme sudden shifts in body temperature. And I will say that also happens with menopause. So we don't want to not talk about the women who travel and might have that condition. Oh, in a hotel, the central air can be controlled by a hotel. Cruise ships have individual digital thermostats, and I do want to be honest that sometimes they are set too warm for me. And you can ask to have those adjusted. If you get a sudden chill or a massive hot flash, you can change your immediate environment in seconds. And I'm one who likes to keep the thermostat at meat-locker temperature. Robert: It's all about control over your environment, isn't it? Which brings us perfectly to our next category. Neurodivergence, sensory perception disruptions, and cognitive fatigue. Which many people call brain fog. A giant ship can look loud and overwhelming from the outside, but structurally it offers something unique. Reason number 11, low sensory zones and certified ship. Theresa: And definitely more cruise lines are paying attention to this and some are certified for sensory considerations. And even the kids programs might have something for low sensory experiences. And as I mentioned before, the newer ships have more of these options and they're getting better and better about accommodating people with body disruptions. So there is an organization called Autism on the Seas and cruise lines that partner with Culture City. So as I mentioned, many modern ships are officially certified sensory inclusive and some of the staff is trained in how to handle sensory activities and neurodivergent people, etc. So they could offer things like noise cancelling headphones, strobe reduction glasses, which that's a good thing to have if you have something like migraines or if it might cause a seizure. That would be a good thing to ask for and you may already have your own. For more nervous or hyperkinetic people, they have fidget tools. But most importantly they designate specific areas of the ship as permanent low sensory zones. You just need to be sure that other people respect that zone. So they have quiet lounges or solariums where music is banned and lighting is dimmed. Robert: And for people dealing with cognitive fatigue, early-stage dementia, or visual impairments, Reason 12 is huge. They're predictable layouts. When you travel overland, every day is a new visual puzzle. A new hotel lobby, a new street grid, a new train station. It's exhausting for the brain. A cruise ship is an enclosed predictable grid. Within 24 hours your brain maps it out. State rooms are in the middle, restaurants are aft, entertainment is forward. Once you learn that geometry, the mental tacks of navigating evaporate. Theresa: That's important for people who might suffer from fatigue. Ask your travel advisor for recommendations. And if you're lucky enough to find somebody who specializes in cruising for the disability community, you're in luck. Maybe you want a state room near an elevator. Oh, be sure to check the deck plan before you go. Then you can get a good idea of the layout of the cruise ship. So for those with specific visual or hearing disruptions, Reason 13 is the integration of assistive visual and auditory technologies. From Braille signage on every cabin door, an elevator button, to closed captioning on state room TVs, and safety briefings, to infrared assistive listening devices in the theaters, the compliance with accessibility standards is incredibly high. Some lines even have designated built-in relief areas with real grass for service animals. And if you happen to need a sign language interpreter, you can also find that. Ask your travel advisor because that's something that needs to be requested well in advance of the sailing date. Robert: That attention to detail is remarkable. Now, let's talk about Reason 14, which is one of my personal favorites. Packing and energy autonomy. I call this the FOMO cure. When you're at a traditional land destination, if the rest of your travel group goes off to see a landmark and you have to stay back in the hotel room because your energy is depleted, you feel left out. You look at a blank wall. On a cruise, if you need to rest, you can lie on your cabin bed or sit on your private balcony and you are still looking at the ocean. You are still experiencing the movement. You can see the islands passing by. You are in the travel experience, even while resting your body. Theresa: Oh, and another tip is when everybody is going out and exploring on shore, it's the perfect time to go sit by the pool or find a quiet place that doesn't stress you out because of the noise. You can go relax and have the space. Mostly to yourself. You don't have to worry about finding a chair or finding a comfortable spot. Do those things that make you feel frazzled when everybody's off the ship. It's like your own personal yacht, or kind of. So it is so true that you can get that FOMO, especially if that was the way you used to travel. I would say that was me for sure and it's still hard to change that because it's real. But to be safe, to not fatigue myself, I have to cut back. Same with Robert. He's cut back. It's harsh, but it's better for us to do that. That all leads to reason 15, the built-in escape hatch. If you decide to push your limits, say you go to the high-energy evening Broadway show or the lively main dining room and midway through your body says, we're done. The battery's at zero. You don't have to call for an Uber, wait for a valet, or walk a mile down a city street, although some walking can be pretty far on a ship. You step out the door, walk to the elevator, and in a few minutes you are back your quiet, dark, safe room. You can brave environments that you might normally avoid because you have an escape option. It's close. It's reliable. Most ships do have separate wheelchairs and you could call somebody, ask your waiter, and they will come with the wheelchair to assist you. It's not for your use on the entire cruise, but it is to help you navigate. Robert: We're entering our homestretch here, and I want to focus on chronic pain, aging bodies, and oncology. People undergoing or recovering from intense medical treatments like cancer therapy. Reason 16 is something that offers relief. Hydrotherapy and thermal sweets. Theresa: Oh, those thermal sweets are heaven. If you have rheumatoid arthritis, fibromyalgia, or you're managing stiffness from an old bone replacement, gravity is your enemy. Cruise ship spas almost always feature thermal sweets. In fact, you can book a spa category of stateroom that gives you access to the spa. It's another thing to ask your travel advisor. They also have specialized treatments. They might have a whirlpool, a jet stream pool, ice pool, massage, and all those other types of treatments or amenities like the heated lounger. It's a good place to relax, and again, it's nice to go there when everyone's off the ship. Robert: And getting down to those spas or up to the pool decks doesn't require a hike, thanks to reason 17. An abundance of elevators. On land, a lot of historic hotels might have one tiny elevator that fits two people, or a resort might require walking up long, sweeping outdoor staircases. Cruise ships are designed around massive vertical elevator banks. If you have a bone replacement or severe joint degradation, you can completely bypass stairs for the entire vacation. Every single floor is equally accessible. Theresa: Another tip, if you have fatigue or your joints or bones hurt, request a stateroom near the elevator, so you can just walk right around the corner from your stateroom. So let's talk about reason 18, which is incredibly sensitive and important. Cancer-safe pampering. For a long time, people undergoing active cancer treatments were turned away from traditional day spas because massage therapists weren't trained in the nuances of oncology, like managing compromised lymph nodes or fragile skin. Today, most major cruise line spa providers train their staff in certified oncology, massage, and skin treatments. It allows someone who's been po-prod-ed, po-prod-ed and treated like a clinical medical guinea pig for months, to safely experience human touch and pampering again. And keep in mind, you can find, or if you don't find it, ask your travel advisor to let you know which kind of treatments are available in the spa. Robert: That's comforting to know. And keeping those same individuals safe is reason 19, rigorous hydration and sanitation standard. If you are immunocompromised, the world feels full of pathogens. But cruise ships, especially after the public health overhauls of the last decade, are hyper-vigilant. There are hand-washing stations at every restaurant entrance, continuous air filtration upgrades, and constant visible sanitation of high-touch surfaces. Furthermore, you have immediate guaranteed access to clean water and food prepared under strict public health regulations. It minimizes the risk environments. Theresa: And although the government has taken off some of the restrictions for the sanitary ratings of ships, cruise lines continue to test. It just makes sense for them. So finally, reason 20. It's not a structural feature or a medical protocol. It's a cultural one. When you have a visible body disruption, whether you're walking with a cane, using a wheelchair, wearing a visible ostomy bag at the pool, or dealing with a prominent tremor, or rocking a bald head from chemotherapy... Robert: Tell me what you mean by that. Theresa: Well, the group is diverse. They come from all over the world, all over the country, and whether you're walking with a cane... I know I was on a ship and somebody came up to me. They offered to help me. They offered me their cane to get around, and people can be very, very helpful. So there you'll see bodies of every shape, age, size, and ability level navigating the decks. There's maybe more of a normalization, not that you should really normalize a disability, but there's an acceptance of different types of disabilities and health management. You aren't the sick person or the disabled guy on the deck because there's another one who is. You're just another passenger heading to the buffet or waiting for the show to start. Robert: That sense of belonging might actually be one of the most therapeutic benefits of all. Theresa: I think it is. When your body feels disrupted, finding a place where you can just be you without explaining yourself or fighting the architecture is a true vacation. But having said that, don't be offended or insulted if somebody asks you if they can help or what your disability is. I wear an eye patch and people will assume that I have one disability and they will ask, and they're always polite. So don't just brush them off. Robert: Well, that's our 20 reasons. If you've been hesitant to travel because you feel like your body can't handle the logistics of the world right now, we highly encourage you to look at a cruise. Start small, maybe a three-night weekend itinerary, and see how the environment treats you. Theresa: And that's a good idea if you are traveling with a disrupted body. But in general, I would like to say the shorter the cruise, the more party the atmosphere is. So keep that in mind. And of course, it depends on our cruise line. A three-day cruise on Holland Americas, that is likely to be the big party weekend. Although I will say that people of all ages party. But their prime reason is to get away, not to just party hardy for the next three days. As always, we'll put links to some of the cruising resources we mentioned, like dialysis at sea and places where you could rent a wheelchair or oxygen or other equipment that you may not like to travel with on the airplane or just on your trip to the port. They'll all be in the show notes. Robert: Until next time, keep living the good life and travel on your own terms. Theresa: Bye everyone. See you next week. (Transcribed by TurboScribe.) Show Notes

Music

Links to Referenced Resources

TSA Cares

Book Your Cruise

Spoon Spending Chart

Autism on the Seas

Dialysis at Sea

Wheelchair Rental

Scootaraound

Special Needs Group

Living The Could Life - A 70-Day Workbook For Living Well After Body Change

Cruising with Body Disruptions and Disability

Robert and Theresa — Tue, 28 Jul 2026 10:58:00 +0000

20 Reasons Why Cruising is a Great Vacation Option for Those Experiencing Body Disruptions

In this episode we explore the advantages of vacationing by cruise. Those with disabilities will appreciate the benefits of traveling in a way that reduces stress, and eliminates changing hotels and dealing with learning new surroundings every day. We share 20 reasons that show why if you are cruising with body disruptions and disability that this is definitely a choice that you should consider when making your vacation plans.

AS AN AMAZON ASSOCIATE I EARN FROM QUALIFYING PURCHASES.

Transcript

Click Here for Transcript Theresa: Welcome back to living the good life the podcast where we redefine what adventure looks like When your body doesn't always follow the standard script. I'm Theresa and I'm Robert Robert: Today, we are tackling a massive topic We talk a lot on this show about the friction of travel the cobblestones that eat wheelchair wheels the airport security lines that exhaust people with chronic pain and The terrifying game of restaurant roulette when you have severe dietary restrictions Theresa: Oh, I understand the restaurant roulette so well I don't have Crohn's or one of those diagnosed diseases Since I've had my gallbladder removed I have Serious digestive problems where if I don't take my one magical pill, which doesn't always work It's best that I just sit in the bathroom all day nothing ruins your vacation faster than a digestive flare-up in a restaurant Especially in a city where you don't speak the language. You can't find a public restroom You don't have a coin to pay for the public restroom or the restroom is down a narrow winding Staircase into the basement, especially bad for people like me with vision loss So sometimes the better option seems to just stay at home and get takeout or something like that But you have to deal with what you have Oh, that's the reality for so many of us dealing with what we call body disruptions Whether that's needing a wheelchair recovering from cancer treatments Managing sensory overload or navigating a joint replacement travel can feel very unfriendly Robert: It really can but today we're dedicating the episode to a travel style That a lot of people write off as old-school or cliche But it is secretly the ultimate hack for adaptive travel cruising and I will Theresa: Admit my guilt. I said that I would never ever No way Not in my life take a cruise because it was for old people novels other things after all we traveled on our own We bicycled across the North American continent. We bicycled in New Zealand and Mexico. We hide think a trail We did all that other stuff. There's no way that I would ever take a cruise I figured I'd have to be playing bing

Remembering that July Celebrates Disability Pride

Robert and Theresa — Tue, 21 Jul 2026 09:52:00 +0000

A short history of of the disability movement

In this episode we explore the beginnings of the disability movement. July is disability month and a time to measure the progress. within the disability community. Some things we take for granted until we need them. Curb cuts are one example. Is it just an update to city planning? It should be, but many of the changes in buildings and in other public spaces is all about the disability movement. It started with a spark and is growing. But, there is still much work to be done.

AS AN AMAZON ASSOCIATE I EARN FROM QUALIFYING PURCHASES.

Transcript

Click Here for Transcript [Speaker 2] Welcome back to Living the Good Life, the podcast where we redefine what adventure looks like when your body doesn't always follow the standard script. I'm Teresa, and this month, July, is Disability Month. Our friends will discuss more information about the disability community in general. Thanks for listening, hope you enjoy this show. [Speaker 1] You know, it's funny, when you walk down a city street today and you see a curb cut, you know, those little concrete ramps right at the corner of an intersection? Right. Or like when you grab a handrail in a public bathroom or you press one of those giant silver buttons to open an automatic door, there is this built-in expectation that it's all just, I don't know, civic engineering. [Speaker 2] Yeah. [Speaker 1] Like at some point, some benevolent city planner just looked at a blueprint, stroked their chin and went, hey, let's make this easier for everybody. Right. We tend to view the accessible world around us as this byproduct of natural passive progress. Yeah, exactly. Like it's just the inevitable march of modern architecture getting, you know, kinder over time. Kinder, right. It feels clean, it feels structural. But then, and this is what we're getting into today, you start actually digging into the history of disability rights in this country, and suddenly that little concrete curb cut isn't just concrete anymore. [Speaker 2] No, not at all. [Speaker 1] It is a battle scar. Like when you look at the accessible landscape, you are looking at a world that was absolutely not given to anyone by benevolent lawmakers. Yeah. It was taken, demanded, and fought for in ways that are honestly jaw-dropping. It is the absolute definition of a hard-won revolution, and it completely shatters that illusion of passive progress, you know? Yeah. You realize very quickly that accessibility is not a charity project. It is a profound matter of civil rights. Which is exactly what we are getting into today. Welcome to the Deep Dive. We are honoring Disability Pride Month, which is celebrated every July to mark the passage of the Americans with Disabilities Act back on July 26, 1990. It's such an important milestone. It really is. And for you listening, our mission today is to take you on a narrative journey. We've got an incredible stack of sources in front of us, ranging from a deeply detailed historical report from the U.S. National Park Service to several contemporary advocacy briefs that

Part 2 More Spoon Theory

Robert and Theresa — Tue, 14 Jul 2026 13:09:21 +0000

Finding Your Baseline

In this episode we continue our exploration of Spoon Theory. We have models for you to find your own baseline. In addition we suggest how Spoon Theory and setting a baseline applies to travel. Want to apply Spoon Theory to travel? It's all about conservation of energy. Einstein might agree.

AS AN AMAZON ASSOCIATE I EARN FROM QUALIFYING PURCHASES.

Transcript

Click Here for Transcript Theresa: Welcome back to Living the Good Life, the podcast where we talk about rebuilding a life after change, the kind of change that shifts your energy, your identity, your body, or your sense of what's possible. This is a short overview of what we discussed. We talked about several types of medical issues, especially that drain your energy. I feel relieved that I do not have something where my mitochondria doesn't convert ATP to energy or an autoimmune disease, although I have been suspected of having one, even though I have some of the symptoms and blood test results that might indicate that. But just to get you up to snuff, we basically talked about how difficult it is for some people to make it through the day. We use spoons as an example of a type of energy currency. Robert: And we talked about where that whole idea came from. It started in 2003 when an advocate for lupus decided she needed a practical way to demonstrate to a friend how her energy allotment worked every day. Theresa: And she used spoons because she was in a diner and that was an easy way to explain. So one thing that we thought about, and this applies to travel because we will be talking about how the spoon theory applies to your travel, is that, I don't want to say in the old days, but when we were both younger, people used to collect souvenir spoons every time they traveled. Robert: And when we took a trip, we were sometimes asked by people who were collectors to see if we could find a spoon from a particular location. Theresa: And we were thinking about that. And because we don't go to souvenir shops very often, we were wondering. So let us know if people do still collect spoons. People put them in wooden cases and you'd see them hanging on a wall in their homes. Robert: And they'd show off their new spoons that they had just gotten from a trip or from a friend. Theresa: And then we realized also when we were younger, when we had our kids, it was pretty common for somebody to buy a spoon for the newborns. Robert: Usually a silver spoon. How to Regulate Your Energy Level
In this episode we talk about the Spoon Theory. Keeping your spoons organized is easier said than done. The practice of using spoons to keep track or your personal energy economy is not only helpful to people with chronic illness. Its usefulness extends to those who have experienced later-in-life disruptors.

Don't forget to come back next week to hear the rest of the story. You will learn how to set your daily spoon limit. There will also be some suggestions for applying the spoon theory to travel.

Living The Could Life contains affiliate links. They don’t cost you anything, but we may earn a small commission if you use them. We may have been hosted on a trip, excursion or other travel-related event. We may have received or experienced a product for review. Any opinion is our own. AS AN AMAZON ASSOCIATE I EARN FROM QUALIFYING PURCHASES

AS AN AMAZON ASSOCIATE I EARN FROM QUALIFYING PURCHASES.

Transcript
Click Here for Transcript Theresa: Welcome back to Living the Good Life, everyone. Today we're opening up a conversation about an idea that has entirely reshaped how millions of people talk about health, chronic illness, and daily survival. It's a framework that is so widely adopted that it's evolved into its own cultural identity. And so today we are going to talk about spoon theory. Robert: It's fascinating because if you spend any time in chronic illness circles online, you'll see people calling themselves spoonies. But if you aren't initiated, you're probably asking, why spoons? Why not batteries, dollars, fuel gauges? Theresa: And to understand that, we have to go back to a diner in 2003. The concept was created by an essayist and advocate named Christine Miserandino. I hope I pronounced that right. Christine was living with lupus, an autoimmune disease where your immune system attacks your healthy tissues like your joints, your skin, and your organs. She was sitting in a diner with a close friend who looked at her and asked what it actually felt like to have lupus. Not the clinical definition, but what it felt like to live with it day to day. Robert: And that's a notoriously hard thing to articulate. When you look healthy on the outside, people assume your internal battery works exactly like theirs. To demonstrate, Christine looked around the diner, grabbed every spoon she could find from the tables around, and handed them to her friend. She handed her 12 spoons. Theresa: And she told her friend, this is your energy for the day. For a healthy person, energy feels virtually limitless. If you want to go to the store, you just go. But for somebody with a chronic illness, every single action requires a choice. And every choice costs a physical asset. In this case, a spoon. Robert: Christine had her friend walk through a typical day. But right out of the gate, before her friend even got out of bed, Christine took a spoon away. Why? Because her friend had woken up late, or slept poorly, or woke up in pain. Then, getti

Living The Could Life Workbook Primer

Robert and Theresa — Tue, 30 Jun 2026 18:31:32 +0000

A Bit More About the Living The Could Life Workbook

In this episode we address some questions about our guided workbook. The gentle aspect of the book led to a few inquiries about the effectiveness of this 70-dday guide. We wanted to take an episode to dive deeper into the focus of the book and the importance of reading the intro and other parts of the workbook. We talk a bit of acetylcholine, Goldilocks and how relative stress may be.

Living The Could Life contains affiliate links. They don’t cost you anything, but we may earn a small commission if you use them. We may have been hosted on a trip, excursion or other travel-related event. We may have received or experienced a product for review. Any opinion is our own. AS AN AMAZON ASSOCIATE I EARN FROM QUALIFYING PURCHASES

AS AN AMAZON ASSOCIATE I EARN FROM QUALIFYING PURCHASES.

Transcript
Click Here for Transcript Theresa: Welcome back to Living the Good Life, where we talk about real travel for real bodies. The kind of trips you can actually take, not the ones that you used to be able to take. I'm Teresa. Today we're talking about how real change happens in the brain, not through force, not through intensity, not through try harder, but through gentle, meaningful challenge. Inside the brain, there's a chemical called acetylcholine. Think of it as your brain's spotlight operator. When something is new, interesting, or requires your attention, acetylcholine turns the spotlight on and says, hey, this matters. Let's strengthen it. For example, if something is too easy, something you can do on autopilot, your brain doesn't bother requiring anything it thinks. Oh, we already know how to do this. So let's make this real with an example. People often say, I do Wyrtle every day. Isn't that good for my brain? And the answer is, it's fun, but it doesn't create any new connections. So acetylcholine barely moves. No spotlight, no rewiring. And my guess is, it makes fewer connections if you learn a second romance language. What do you think? As opposed to a Germanic language. Robert: I guess the grammar is different. Like German, the joke is they always wait for the end of the sentence. Theresa: Right. We should do that for this podcast. Make you wait. Robert: And yeah, I hear people say learning Greek is very difficult, where they say learning Spanish is a lot easier, but when you start becoming really fluent in Spanish, it's still pretty, pretty challenging, I think. Theresa: And I think other languages, like some of the Asian languages or Chinese, which is, I believe, called a tonal language, where, you know, high, high pitch. I know they use the example ma, like there's several different ways to pronounce ma, and it totally changes the meaning. But anyway, I was just wondering about that. I don't know. So, back to language. Your brain can't solve, learn, you know, a problem, the problem of learning a new language with its old circuitry. Acetylcholine spikes, the spotlight turns on, and your brain says, this is unfamiliar. I, I need to build some new circuits. A Deep Dive Into South Beach
In this episode we share our experience with our wonderful guide, Ileana from ToursByLocals. It's an ideal way to learn more about South Beach. We delved into the Art Deco heritage of the town. Next time, we are there, we will be more observant noticing the small details of the Art Deco style. We usually stay in an Art Deco apartment and will look out for more details the next time that we visit South Beach

Living The Could Life contains affiliate links. They don’t cost you anything, but we may earn a small commission if you use them. We may have been hosted on a trip, excursion or other travel-related event. We may have received or experienced a product for review. Any opinion is our own. AS AN AMAZON ASSOCIATE I EARN FROM QUALIFYING PURCHASES

AS AN AMAZON ASSOCIATE I EARN FROM QUALIFYING PURCHASES.

Transcript
Click Here for Transcript Theresa: Welcome back to Living the Could Life, where we talk about real travel for real bodies. It's the kind of trips you can actually take, not the ones influencers pretend to float through and show their wonderful bodies and new outfits. We're not quite like that. Today, we are heading to South Beach, part of Miami, that's in Florida, but it's not the version you get from a brochure. We're talking about exploring it with tours by locals and why having a local guide can completely change your experience. Robert: And we're not just talking about someone who knows the area. We mean people who live the culture, understand the history, and can point out the tiny details you'd walk right past, especially on an architectural tour, which is one of the most underrated ways to understand this part of Miami. Theresa: And that is so important. I've taken other tours. I was actually on a tour from a cruise ship where the guy just said: “On the left is the ocean,on the right are the mountains.” This advice applies to other tour companies or touring guides as well. Back to South Beach. It's one of the places where you can really get along on your own. You can walk. It's very walkable. You can take the free trolley. You can take a bus. There's Uber and other shared ride services. But to really get a good look at the area, it helps to have a guide or to have done a significant amount of research. So when you go on your own, it's likely you might miss 80% of the local interesting architecture, the local facts about South Beach. A lot of people there, they go just to go swimming, go to the beach, sunbathe, hang out, eat, drink, and party. With the local guide, you get the stories behind all the neon, the Art Deco, the families who've owned and operated restaurants and hotels for years, and the preservation battles behind the Art Deco district. Robert: And let's be honest, South Beach can be overwhelming. Crowds, heat, parking, noise. A local guide cuts through all that. They know the shady spots to stand in, the quiet corners, the clean bathrooms, the places where you can actually hear yourself think. Theresa: And that was definitely good for us, especially for me. When I don't see well, it was nice to know where

The Boat Company Saves the Tongass

Robert and Theresa — Tue, 16 Jun 2026 17:55:58 +0000

Part 2: The Science Behind the Tongass and Why The Boat Company Wants to Preserve the Forest

In this episode we share a deeper dive into the Science of The Tongass National Forest. We have combined several bits of research, interviews and personal experience into two Notebook-generated conversations. The convo not only shows the advantages of sailing with The Boat Company, but also delves into the science that illustrates exactly why The Boat Company continues its committed to preserving this large expanse of inimitable space.

Living The Could Life contains affiliate links. They don’t cost you anything, but we may earn a small commission if you use them. We may have been hosted on a trip, excursion or other travel-related event. We may have received or experienced a product for review. Any opinion is our own.

Transcript
Click Here for Transcript Speaker 2: So, I want you to imagine that you are sitting on this incredibly green, mossy log in absolute silence. Speaker 2: Just totally off the grid. Speaker 2: Exactly. You are miles from cell service and you think, ah, I have completely escaped the global economy. I'm finally out of it. Speaker 1: Yeah, you feel totally isolated from all of that. Speaker 2: Right. But you are actually sitting right on top of a highly aggressive $2.2 billion commodities market. Speaker 1: Oh, wow. That is quite the visual. Speaker 2: Isn't it? So, welcome to our deep dive into the Tongass National Forest in Southeast Alaska. Speaker 1: It's an incredible topic and I'm really excited to get into the sources we have today. Speaker 2: Same here. But before we get into the hidden mechanics of what is happening under that moss, I really want you to try and picture the sheer scale of this place. Because, I mean, when I hear the word forest, my brain usually defaults to a nice, manageable state park. Speaker 1: Right. Like maybe some paved trails, a little visitor center. Speaker 2: Yeah, a place you can drive across in an hour, buy a postcard and go home. But the Tongass is over 16 million acres. Speaker 1: Which is, I mean, to put 16 million acres into a frame of reference that the human brain can actually process, you are looking at a landmass that covers roughly 80% of all of Southeast Alaska. Speaker 2: 80%? Speaker 1: Yeah. It is the largest national forest in the United States by a massive margin. But it is not just, you know, a monolithic block of pine trees sitting on a flat plain. The geography is completely splintered. Speaker 2: Splintered is a great way to p

Deeper Diving Into The Tongass

Robert and Theresa — Tue, 09 Jun 2026 16:32:23 +0000

Part 1: What We Learned Cruising With The Boat Company

In this episode we share a deeper dive into the Tongass Naational Forest. We have combined several bits of research, interviews and personal experience into twoNotebook generated conversations. The convo not only shows the advantages of sailing with The Boat Company, but also delves into the science that illustrates exactly why The Boat Company continues its committed to preserving this large expanse of inimitable space.

Living The Could Life contains affiliate links. They don’t cost you anything, but we may earn a small commission if you use them. We may have been hosted on a trip, excursion or other travel-related event. We may have received or experienced a product for review. Any opinion is our own.

Transcript
Click Here for Transcript Speaker 2: So, I want you to imagine that you are sitting on this incredibly green, mossy log in absolute silence. Speaker 2: Just totally off the grid. Speaker 2: Exactly. You are miles from cell service and you think, ah, I have completely escaped the global economy. I'm finally out of it. Speaker 1: Yeah, you feel totally isolated from all of that. Speaker 2: Right. But you are actually sitting right on top of a highly aggressive $2.2 billion commodities market. Speaker 1: Oh, wow. That is quite the visual. Speaker 2: Isn't it? So, welcome to our deep dive into the Tongass National Forest in Southeast Alaska. Speaker 1: It's an incredible topic and I'm really excited to get into the sources we have today. Speaker 2: Same here. But before we get into the hidden mechanics of what is happening under that moss, I really want you to try and picture the sheer scale of this place. Because, I mean, when I hear the word forest, my brain usually defaults to a nice, manageable state park. Speaker 1: Right. Like maybe some paved trails, a little visitor center. Speaker 2: Yeah, a place you can drive across in an hour, buy a postcard and go home. But the Tongass is over 16 million acres. Speaker 1: Which is, I mean, to put 16 million acres into a frame of reference that the human brain can actually process, you are looking at a landmass that covers roughly 80% of all of Southeast Alaska. Speaker 2: 80%? Speaker 1: Yeah. It is the largest national forest in the United States by a massive margin. But it is not just, you know, a monolithic block of pine trees sitting on a flat plain. The geography is completely splintered. Speaker 2: Splintered is a great way to put it. In this episode we share details about a recent cruise to Alaska. The Boat Company is a non-profit cruise line that has been plying the waters in SE Alaska for decades. Is this cruise line appropriate for those of us with body disruptions? Listen to find out.

Living The Could Life contains affiliate links. They don’t cost you anything, but we may earn a small commission if you use them. We may have been hosted on a trip, excursion or other travel-related event. We may have received or experienced a product for review. Any opinion is our own.

Transcript
Click Here for Transcript Theresa: Some places don't need to be sold, they just need to be shown. Southeast Alaska is one of those places. It's a world of mist, mountains, and water that feels untouched, almost ancient. Robert: And tucked inside that world is the Boat Company, a small non-profit that's been quietly, steadily protecting this landscape for more than 40 years. They don't advertise loudly, they don't chase trends, they simply invite people into a place they love and use travel to help save it. Theresa: Today, we're talking about small ship cruising in Alaska with the Boat Company. Unlike other cruise lines you've heard of, they operate two small vessels, the Leesorone and the Mist Cove, each carrying just 20 to 24 guests. We sailed on Mist Cove. It's intimate, personal, and deeply connected to the land and water around it. Robert: And their mission centers on one of the most extraordinary ecosystems on Earth, the Tongass National Forest. Theresa: And because so many travelers don't realize what the Tongass actually is, and some have never really heard about it, we want to pause here and give it the space it deserves. Welcome to Living the Good Life. I'm Theresa. Robert: And I'm your co-host, Robert. So let's get into it. The Tongass National Forest is the largest national forest in the United States. Nearly 17 million acres of islands, fjords, mountains, glaciers, and old-growth rainforest. It covers almost 80% of southeast Alaska and forms the U.S. portion of the largest temperate rainforest left on Earth. Theresa: Like Alaska, this is a giant forest. Almost everything in Alaska is much bigger than you expect, or at least it was far bigger than I ever expected. This is the forest of giants like the ancient Sitka Spruce, Western Hemlock, and Cedar. They have stood for hundreds, sometimes more than a thousand years. It's the old-growth forest at its best. These trees rise like pillars in a green cathedral, draped in moss and rooted in tongue. Robert: Beneath those trees runs water. Cold, clear, life-giving water. 19,000 miles of salmon streams braid through the Tongass. All five species of Pacific salmon spawn here, feeding bears, eagles, wolves, communities, and entire regional economies. Theresa: You can't go to Alaska without trying salmon. Wildlife thrives here in ways that feel almost mythical. Brown and black bears, the rare Alexander Archipelago wolf, Sitka black-tailed deer, and more tha

Choosing Accessible Accommodations

Robert and Theresa — Tue, 26 May 2026 22:27:11 +0000

In this episode we share details about choosing accommodations for people with disabilities. You may be surprised to know that ADA only requests that lodging institutions meet minimal standards to comply. Comfort and ADA may be two totally different things.

Living The Could Life contains affiliate links. They don’t cost you anything, but we may earn a small commission if you use them. We may have been hosted on a trip, excursion or other travel-related event. We may have received or experienced a product for review. Any opinion is our own.

Transcript
Click Here for Transcript : Theresa: I once checked into an ADA compliant hotel room and it was not what I expected. The shower chair was in the closet, the bed was too high, and the rolling shower had a three inch lip. Robert: And that's when you know this trip just got complicated. Theresa: Today we're talking about accessible lodging, what ADA compliance really means, why it can be misleading, and how to choose a place that actually works for your needs. Robert: And we're also talking about something that gets overlooked way too often, comfort and support for caregivers. Theresa: Welcome back to Living the Could Life. Robert: I'm Theresa Robert: and I'm your co-host Robert. Let's get into it. Robert: We've all seen the blue and green sign from the highway. Holiday Inn Express is the king of the consistent stay. But if you're a traveler with a disability, is consistent always a good thing? Theresa: To some, it's a lifesaver. To others, it's a minefield of almost accessible features. Today we're breaking down what it's really like to navigate mid-scale chain hotels, the psychology of why we pick them, and the red flag phrases that should make you run for the hills. Robert: I used to think these hotels were so bland. It's like they copy-pasted the room across 2,000 locations. Everything is always in the same exact spot. Isn't that boring? Theresa: Well, to you, and formerly to me, it was bland. But then, it's a map I have already memorized. When I roll into a Holiday Inn Express, I don't have to solve the puzzle of the room. I already know the bathroom's here. The bed height's predictable. And I can reach the light switch from the bed. Robert: So the lack of surprise is actually the luxury? Theresa: Exactly. In my world, and for many others with body disruptions, a surprise is usually a barrier. That boring layout reduces my cognitive load. I'll take predictable over pretty every day of the week. Robert: Let's talk about the booking process. I called a hotel last week for a friend and asked about the roll-in shower. And the guy at the desk said, it's p

Living the Could Life First Season Recap

Robert and Theresa — Tue, 19 May 2026 13:37:30 +0000

About this Episode:

This episode recaps our first season of episodes. We made it! We will continue sharing information on adjusting to later-in-life changes with an emphasis on continuing to travel after such body disruptions.

We have several free downloads of helpful information in the previous episodes and have recently published a full workbook to help you change your habits so that you can successfully adapt to the body that you have today.

You will find that helpful resourse - Living the Could Life: A 70-day Workbook for living Well After Body Disruptions

Transcript
Click Here for Transcript Theresa: Welcome to Living the Good Life. I'm Theresa. Robert: And I'm Robert. We recently broadcast our 10th episode and are celebrating that milestone this week. Theresa: We created Living the Good Life for those who suddenly found that their body's performance doesn't sync with their mental attitude. In fact, you've come to the right place, and if you've been listening to us since the beginning, thank you so much. Navigating disability, chronic illness, aging, or any kind of life change was not in your plans? Please join us. Robert: In our past episodes, we have talked about the two meanings of could, 70 days to change, and also about how to cruise in Alaska and the Great Lakes. Theresa: We've also added several complimentary downloads to help guide you through your personal journey while dealing with later in life body disruptions. Robert: In addition to all this, we have created a full workbook, Living the Good Life, a 70-day workbook for living well after body disruption, which you will find for sale on amazon.com. Theresa: We'll add that link to the show notes. We will be back next week for the start of our second season. Please join us to learn about accommodations, cruising on an expedition cruise in Alaska with the nonprofit cruise operator, The Boat Company. There is a lot more coming in our second season. See you next week. Thanks for listening to Living the Good Life. (Transcribed by TurboScribe. Go Unlimited to remove this message.) Show Notes
Music
Music Credits (click to expand)
Carpe Diem — Kevin MacLeod Licensed under CC BY 4.0 https://incompetech.com

Ascending the Vale — Kevin MacLeod Licensed under CC BY 4.0 https://incompetech.com

Bloom — Pixabay Music Licensed under Pixabay Content License https://pixabay.com/music/

Living The Could Life - A 70-Day Workbook For Living Well After Body Change

Cruising the Great Lakes with Victory I

Robert and Theresa — Tue, 12 May 2026 08:14:00 +0000

Part 2 - The Ship

In this episode we share details about the ship itself. How does it work for those with disabilities? What is a typical daily schedule? Which features keep guests returning?

Living The Could Life contains affiliate links. They don’t cost you anything, but we may earn a small commission if you use them. We may have been hosted on a trip, excursion or other travel-related event. We may have received or experienced a product for review. Any opinion is our own.

Transcript
Click Here for Transcript Robert: Welcome to Living the Could Life. I'm Robert and we recently returned from a Great Lakes cruise leaving out of Toronto and ending up in Chicago. Theresa: And I'm Theresa. We sailed on Victory One. It's the first cruise of the Great Lakes for the season, so that's very exciting and we're happy to be on board. Robert: We're going to talk about the airport, the hotel, the ship, and we've discussed the itinerary already and we're going to concentrate mostly on accessibility and what it was like to move around on the ship and the rooms, the restaurants. Theresa: And that's correct. If you go and look at a previous, actually one we talked about the Great Lakes in general and there is a part one of this podcast where we mostly talked about the ports on the cruise. So we are going to start from the beginning and that includes, We left home for a short drive of about an hour to the Manistee airport and we took a flight. Robert: I believe it was 21 minutes over to Chicago and then in Chicago we picked up a flight going to Toronto. Theresa: And we arrived in Toronto and going through immigration was fairly quick and easy, but getting, well, getting an Uber was also easy. Getting to our hotel, the Westin Harbor Castle in downtown right near the islands right in the center of town, took a bit of time because a lot of the roads had been closed. The main quick arteries. Robert: The Gardner expressway. Theresa: Like the Gardner. So we had to take just, I guess I'll say not such quick streets. So it took us maybe over an hour. Robert: In what should have been probably a 20 minute drive, I think. Theresa: And then our Uber driver was not so sure of where the hotel was and you can't blame him because we got there and the entrance isn't really that easy to see. He stopped down the street, but you actually have to turn down the next block and there's a parking garage which you go through and up two levels to get to the main entrance of the hotel. Robert: So you can drive the winding driveway up to the main entrance or from the street level you can take two flights of stairs up and then there is around the corner, if you're facing the hotel on the right side, there is an accessible entrance. It's usually activated with a key card, but if you're just coming to the hotel for the first time you can

Review of the Great Lakes Cruise on Victory I

Robert and Theresa — Wed, 06 May 2026 19:08:46 +0000

Part I - The Itinerary

In this episode, we share our opinions of Victory I as she plies the Great Lakes. We pay particular attention to accessibility.

Living The Could Life contains affiliate links. They don’t cost you anything, but we may earn a small commission if you use them. We may have been hosted on a trip, excursion or other travel-related event. We may have received or experienced a product for review. Any opinion is our own.

Transcript
Click Here for Transcript Hi, welcome to living the good life. I'm Theresa and I'm Robert. We are sadly on the last day of our Victory One cruise along the great lakes. We started in Toronto where Victory includes the first night at a hotel, which makes a lot of sense because many people travel, a lot of our fellow cruisers are from California and areas far away areas that aren't on the great lakes. Robert: Although there are a few of us from the Midwest, we landed in Toronto and we want to focus a little bit on the accessibility needs or if there were any problems along the way. And we found navigating the Toronto airport was fairly easy. A bit of walking to finally get to the Uber pickup. Theresa: There was a lot of construction in Toronto. The Gardiner Highway was close, so it took us a little longer, but we did research the Westin Harbourfront Castle, which is where we stayed. It was a great location. We did find an accessible entrance. It's around if you're facing the front and you are on the street because it's a very strange entrance, like you go into a parking garage and there's an entrance. But if you're on the street facing the parking, you just head to the right. And there is a sign there. But unfortunately, they want you to have a room key. If you don't just hit the intercom button and somebody will let you in. Robert: The main entrance to the hotel was actually two stories up from the street level. So you had to drive up a reasonably steep driveway, I guess, up to the front doors. And that was easy enough to do. And that's where you would also pick up your Ubers or taxis or any other transportation if you needed to get down to the street level on the inside, you could take an elevator down two levels and then come out again, the accessibility door that's on the, as Theresa said, on the right side, and it takes you right out to the street. Theresa: And we had looked for it and had a little problem. It looks like a door for the staff or unaccessible, you know, do not go beyond here. So just look when you get off the elevator. You turn left and then it will be on your right. It's like double doors. It is not Walmart. Nothing says accessible. Robert: Once we got outside and the sidewalks were pretty clear, there were curb cuts at all of the intersections and all the crosswalks. The one thing is you really have to watch out for the bicyclists, because when you're going across a crosswalk, there are bicycle lanes that are also going perpendicular to the crosswalk. So you have to look both ways because the bicyclists come in both directions. And there were enough e-bikes that were moving along at a good clip. Theresa: Right. So that all worked out. There was a registrat

Toronto to Chicago, Cruising on Victory

Robert and Theresa — Wed, 29 Apr 2026 03:04:03 +0000

Alternatives to Ocean Cruising.

In this episode we focus on a voyage that visits all five Great Lakes. For some the idea is curious and unusual. Others understand the draw of these great lakes.

Living The Could Life contains affiliate links. They don’t cost you anything, but we may earn a small commission if you use them. We may have been hosted on a trip, excursion or other travel-related event. We may have received or experienced a product for review. Any opinion is our own.

Transcript
Click Here for Transcript Theresa: We are currently in Toronto and about ready or getting ready to board the Victory One. Robert: We're on Ward's Island on a dock that's actually facing the Victory One, the ship that we're going to be on. It's docked next to the Viking Octantis. Theresa: And I don't know if you can hear in the background, there are a lot of birds. And I don't know if this is on any flyway. I do know that, well, I guess south of here is Rochester, New York, but when you go west in Ontario, there is a flyway that I believe goes across Pelee Island and then to the south shore of Lake Erie, where there is a very large birding and migratory area. They have a big birding event every year near, well, it's not Fort Clinton, but it's very close to one of Ohio's nice state parks with lodges called the Maumee Bay State Park. Robert: I remember coming here during the 1960s when we would come up for the summers to visit relatives in Toronto. And we're standing on the dock that we often visited and we'll be going back, back into the center part of Ward's Island to the cafe, the Island Cafe. Theresa: Which supposedly now sells beer, which wasn't allowed before. There's Ward's Center and those two connect. And Hanlan's Point. And then Hanlan's Point. We took a ferry right from near the Weston Harbourfront Castle, where we stayed last night. And on Victory, your cruise starts the night before. And that makes a lot of sense, especially if you're flying in, because we know how flights work. And we talked to a few fellow guests at registration. It seems some have come from Central California and they're surprised at how cold it is here. I think it's 50 today and we're thinking that is warm. Robert: It's a nice blue sky. Yeah, nice blue sky, 50 degrees, a very light breeze. Theresa: We've seen one of my favorite birds, but didn't hear it. That is the common loon. And maybe mallard duck, but I don't own my birds so well, especially my ducks. Looks to be that this part of the island is a wetland. So I think if you were a birder, this might be, or a ducker, I don't know. But I think this could be good for birding. Are there a lot of cottages here? Robert: And they've been here for a very long time. I remember when I was 8, 9, 10 years old, we'd come here. This was always a high point of our summer vacation when we visited relatives to come to the islands and the cottages were always there. Robert: We're on Ward's Is

Cruising The Great Lakes

Robert and Theresa — Tue, 21 Apr 2026 17:17:42 +0000

Freshwater Adventures

In this episode we focus on cruising the large inland lakes of the US - the Great Lakes. The ports are fascinating and the ships are smaller and ideal for those whose bodies have been disrupted. You may be surprised by what there is to discover while Cruising the Great Lakes!

Living The Could Life contains affiliate links. They don’t cost you anything, but we may earn a small commission if you use them. We may have been hosted on a trip, excursion or other travel-related event. We may have received or experienced a product for review. Any opinion is our own.

Transcript
Click Here for Transcript Theresa: Welcome back to Living the Good Life, where we explore real world travel for real bodies. Adventures that are meaningful, doable, and full of wonder. Today, we're heading somewhere unexpected, the Great Lakes. Not the ocean, not the Caribbean, but a freshwater cruising region that's older than the pyramids and bigger than many countries. Robert: And if you're thinking, wait, cruises? On the Great Lakes? Oh yes, not only do they exist, they've been around for over a century and now they're having a major renaissance. Theresa: And I have always lived in a state with the Great Lakes, so we're fairly familiar with them and have visited all five. So today, we're diving into the history, the ships, the cruise lines, the ports, and the surprising magic of these inland seas. Robert: Let's start with the basics. The Great Lakes, Superior, Michigan, Huron, Erie, and Ontario. They hold 20% of the world's fresh surface water. That's wild. Theresa: And when I was in school, to remember the names of them, we remembered the word homes. Huron, Ontario, Michigan, Erie, Superior. So we could get them all. And some people are really surprised when they see the Great Lakes, but we'll go into that a bit later. And they are enormous. Lake Superior is the size of Austria. Lake Michigan is bigger than Croatia. These are not ponds. You can look at them and think you're on the ocean. The lakes, these are inland seas with their own weather systems. And we can tell you up in our part of Michigan all about lake effect weather. They have their own weather systems, their own tides, even their own maritime culture. Robert: And their own shipwrecks, thousands of them. The lakes have been major shipping routes since the 1800s, and storms here can be brutal. The most famous wreck is the Edmund Fitzgerald, lost in 1975 on Lake Superior. Theresa: Which is why lighthouses in this area are such a big part of the Great Lakes identity. In fact, Michigan, and this may be surprising to some people, it has more lighthouses than any other state. Robert: And that sense of maritime history is part of what makes Great Lakes cruising so different. You're not just island hopping, you're time traveling. Theresa: Right, and there are so many interesting maritime museums along the coast of the lakes. Most of them have a different focus. Some

Traveling With Your Special Needs Person

Robert and Theresa — Tue, 14 Apr 2026 11:56:12 +0000

HAVE A BACKUP PLAN FOR WHENEVER YOU TRAVEL!

In this episode, we share our Plan Z strategy for traveling with a person with special needs. Making a few adjustments helps your travel go smoother. Remember that it is the smiles that count.

Living The Could Life contains affiliate links. They don’t cost you anything, but we may earn a small commission if you use them. We may have been hosted on a trip, excursion or other travel-related event. We may have received or experienced a product for review. Any opinion is our own.

Transcript
Click Here for Transcript : Robert: Show Notes
Music
Opening Theme “Carpe Diem” by Kevin MacLeod Licensed under Creative Commons: Attribution 4.0 http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ Source: incompetech.com Interlude: "Ascending the Vale" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ Closing Theme “Bloom” via Pixabay CC0 License (No attribution required) Source: pixabay.com/music
Mentioned in Living the Could Life

Cambria Suites

Living The Could Life - A 70-Day Workbook For Living Well After Body Change

Amsterdam and Muiderslot

Robert and Theresa — Tue, 07 Apr 2026 14:38:48 +0000

Exploring the Low Country With Ease

In this episode, we share tips and tales for exploring Amsterdam and Muiderslot. Amsterdam recently celebrated its 750th anniversary. And that connects nicely with Muiderslot. Do you know the connection?

Living The Could Life contains affiliate links. They don’t cost you anything, but we may earn a small commission if you use them. We may have been hosted on a trip, excursion or other travel-related event. We may have received or experienced a product for review. Any opinion is our own.

Transcript
Click Here for Transcript : Robert: Welcome back to Living the Could Life, the podcast where we explore the world at a pace that honors your body, your energy, and your curiosity. I'm glad you're here. I'm Robert and I'm Theresa. Theresa: Today we are taking you to one of Europe's most enchanting cities, Amsterdam, and then on a slow scenic day trip to one of the best preserved medieval castles in the Netherlands, Muiderslot, and I don't speak Dutch, so... Robert: This episode is especially for travelers with disabilities, chronic illness, mobility limitations, or anyone who prefers a gentler, more accessible way to explore. We're talking public transportation, accessibility, highlights of the city, and how to reach Muiderslot by train, bus, or ferry. Theresa: And we'll get into the castle's history as well. It's surprisingly dramatic, plus we'll also talk about what's accessible and what's not at the castle, and where to eat in the charming little town of Muiden. Robert: So, settle in. Let's start in Amsterdam. Theresa: Picture this. You're crossing a 17th century cobblestone bridge while simultaneously eating a cone of hot fries and dodging speeding bicycles. You're not in a museum. You're standing inside an open-air museum. A 750-year-old experiment that's still unfolding. Robert: That's Amsterdam. Living history with momentum. Theresa: You aren't just observing the past. You're actively trying not to get run over by it. Robert: The city is ancient, but wildly forward-thinking. To understand it, you have to start with the ground, or really the water, it's built on. Theresa: Right, and we want to understand how a city built entirely on water mastered its incredibly challenging environment, created world-class art, and and just threw a massive year-long birthday party just to celebrate its own survival. Robert: This isn't just a travel itinerary. It's a look at urban evolution. How does a place go from a muddy swamp to a global powerhouse without losing its soul along the way? Theresa: And it's a fundamental rule of urban design. Geography is destiny, and Amsterdam's geography is its most defining feature.

Cruising in Alaska

Robert and Theresa — Tue, 31 Mar 2026 20:58:02 +0000

Getting Ready to Travel

In this episode, we share tips and tales for cruising in Alaska. There are many options for those of us with body changes. This is the foundation of the Living the Could Life approach.

Transcript
Click Here for Transcript : Theresa: Welcome back to Living the Good Life, where we talk about travel, change, and what it means to build a life that fits the body you have today, not the one you used to have or the one you wish you had. I'm Teresa. Robert: And I'm Robert. Today we're diving into a bucket list giant, Alaska, but we're doing it through a lens that doesn't get talked about often enough. What it's like to cruise the last frontier when you're navigating mobility challenges, low vision, chronic illness, or other challenges. Theresa: We often talk about the two meanings of could. There's the polite permission, could I sit here? And then there's the possibility I still could see the world. Alaska is just the perfect could destination. Robert: Exactly. It's about the science of the could. We've talked about the McGill University studies on neuroplasticity, how our brains can rewire to find new ways to navigate the world. Alaska cruises are built for that. The scenery comes to you. You can sit on a balcony or in a lounge with floor to ceiling windows and have a front view seat to a glacier without taking a single step. Theresa: People often ask, can I really do Alaska with a disability? Robert: And the answer is a resounding yes. In fact, Alaska is arguably the best accessible wild destination on earth because the cruise ships act as mobile base camps. You get the glaciers and the grizzly bears without the vertical hikes. Theresa: Use the 70-day workbook or calendar that is listed in the show notes to practice before your cruise. If you aren't used to a scooter, practice in a local grocery store. If you have low vision, practice using your assistive tech in new environments. Maybe you're on a new med or digestive schedule. See how that works best for you before hopping on a cruise ship. By the time you hit the gangway in Alaska, your brain has already done the could work. Robert: Just a bit of housekeeping before we start. Mainstream cruises in Alaska start at four different ports. Seattle, Vancouver, Seward, and Whittier. The last two are near Anchorage and are usually one way. The others can be either one way or round trip. We will be focusing on round trip Seattle for today. Seattle has many daily flights. It's a great city to visit and the port is convenient to access from downtown. Actually, there are two ports there. Be sure you know which one you're going to. Theresa: What we like to do when in Seattle is grab a city pass and explore Seattle either before or after the cruise. Another thing I really like about the port of Seattle is that when your ship returns to Seattle, you can send your luggage for free from the ship to the airport. All ships do not seem t

70-Days to Change

Robert and Theresa — Wed, 25 Mar 2026 03:35:39 +0000

Getting Ready to Travel

In this episode, we walk through the 70‑Day Change Plan — why it works, how it supports slow, sustainable change, and what it looks like to rebuild your life one honest day at a time. This is the foundation of the Living the Could Life approach.

Transcript
Click Here for Transcript Disclaimer: Before we dive into today's episode, a quick but important note. The information shared in this podcast is for general educational and entertainment purposes only. We love sharing our insights, but please remember, this content does not constitute medical, health, or professional advice. Every body and every situation is unique. You should always consult with a qualified medical specialist or healthcare professional before starting any new program, making lifestyle changes, or acting on any information you hear today. Your health is your responsibility, so let's keep it safe. Theresa: Welcome back to Living the Good Life, the podcast where we talk about rebuilding a life after change, the kind of change that shifts your energy, your identity, your body, or your sense of what's possible. Today, we're diving into something that sits at the center of this entire project, the language of good, the science of neuroplasticity, and a 70-day rhythm that helps your brain adapt to a new reality. Be sure you listen to the disclaimer. At the beginning, everything here that we say is just for education and entertainment. We're not doctors, lawyers, medical professionals. Oh, and by the way, I'm Theresa. Robert: And I'm Robert. This isn't just theory. This is lived experience, neuroscience, aging research, and the kind of gentle, sustainable change that actually works, especially for people navigating body changes, chronic illness, or later life transitions. We're going to talk about Helmstetter, McGill, Yale, habit formation, and the two very different meanings of could. Theresa: And this is a bit of a review. We did talk about the meanings of could last week, but they fit in again with the 70-day change plan. There's probably a point that we all had where we realized we weren't going back to who we were and how our body was before it changed. Your energy changed, your capacity changed, and you kept waiting for the old version of yourself to come back online, kind of like a system reboot that just needed one more time. But it didn't. And eventually, we all have to face the truth. We weren't going back. We had to learn to build a new life from where we were and where we are now in this body with this energy and with this reality. And that's where this whole 70-day idea started to take shape. For example, we recently built a house and are still building it. And my vision changed during that period. So although we were already building a house for aging in place. Robert: And that included things like 36-inch-wide doors to accommodate a wheelchair if that was ever necessary, lighting so that there were no dark areas in the house. Theresa: Walk-in shower, vanities where a wheelchair could fit under, and extra handrails, like double railings on any stairs. I found the basement stairs created a lot of psychological friction, like it was a magnet pulling me into the space. So we j

Could Has Two Meanings

Robert and Theresa — Tue, 17 Mar 2026 23:54:08 +0000

The active could helps us travel with body changes

Living the Could Life focuses on the meanings of "could". One is polite or passive while the other "could"results in action. Learning to travel with a compromised or changed body takes some adjustments, but with small steps, there is still the possibility of being able to travel in an acceptable manner. Traveling with body changes will become the new norm.

Living The Could Life contains affiliate links. They don’t cost you anything, but we may earn a small commission if you use them. We may have been hosted on a trip, excursion or other travel-related event. We may have received or experienced a product for review. Any opinion is our own.

Transcript
Click Here for Transcript one selected Robert: Welcome to Living the Could Life. Today we are discussing the two definitions of could and how it applies to adaptation. I'm Robert. Theresa: And I'm Theresa. In linguistics and behavioral psychology, there's a well-documented distinction between the two ways could is used. It essentially comes down to modal strength, which we will call possibility, and the direction of the focus, which we will call agency. This takes me back to many years ago when I studied linguistics and actually Robert and I were in the same class. Robert also continued on with linguistics. Robert: Yes, I did. I actually minored in linguistics with a specialty in algebraic linguistics. But back to the topic at hand. There's a moment in every reinvention when you realize you're not trying to go back anymore. You're trying to go forward. And that shift doesn't happen all at once. It happens in small, meaningful increments. Theresa: Today we're talking about how all those pieces come together. Through the way our brains store meaning, through the way we adapt over time, and through the power of one small word, could. Robert: We're bringing in some ideas that help explain why could works so well. That's the fuzzy trace theory. How we remember the meaning of things, not the details. We'll get to that a little bit later. Theresa: Okay, so we are now going to discuss the two different coulds. And we'll be talking a lot about the two different versions of could. There's the polite, hesitant could. The one that avoids commitment. And then there's the possibility could. The one that opens a door. Robert: The possibility could is the one that helps us rebuild after life changes. It's the one that says, I could try this, instead of I should be able to do this. Research, particularly in the fields of neurolinguistics and cognitive psychology, categorizes these coulds as follows. First, the possibility could. The suggestion. It highlights that an option exists in the external world, but doesn't necessarily link it to the person's internal drive. The research on linguistic hedging shows that this type of could creates a mental safety net, because it implies something might not happen as much as it might. The brain processes it as a hypothetical or a gist. The effect is excellent f

About Living the Could Life

Robert and Theresa — Tue, 10 Mar 2026 16:07:32 +0000

About this Episode:

This episode introduces who we are, why we created Living the Could Life, and why we are here. If you’ve suddenly found that your body's performance doesn't sync with your mental attitude, you have come to the right place. Navigating disability, chronic illness, aging, or any kind of life change was not in your plans? Join us.

This is basically an introduction to us and what we hope to share in upcoming episodes.

Transcript
Click Here for Transcript Theresa: Welcome to the very first episode of Living the Could Life. I'm Theresa. If you're here, you're probably someone who's had to adapt your life several times, maybe by choice, maybe not, or maybe you're still figuring out what the next chapter looks like.Either way, you are in the right place. Robert: And I'm Robert, your co-host, the guy who scopes out the area, takes photos of inaccessible places, and who's trying hard to earn his seeing-eye guy vest. Yep, you sure are. Theresa: You should have your vest really soon. You're getting really good at this. The show isn't about pretending everything is fine, easy, or trivial. It's all about adaptation. It's about the difference between what travel should look like, no pun intended, and what it could look like now. Don't expect any toxic positivity from us. We are here to support each other, be realistic, and share ideas. And since this is our first full episode, we want to start with the heart of the brand, where this idea came from, what it means, and why we're choosing to tell these stories now. By the way, we should tell you a bit more about ourselves. I'm Theresa, a travel writer who, in later life, suffered NAION, also known as Non-Arteritic Anterior Ischemic Optical Neuropathy. Basically, it's a stroke of the eye, and I started with that happening in my right eye. But did you know you can still be fairly independent with one well-functioning eye? It took a bit of adaptation, but I did okay for several years, until one day, the vision in the other eye rebelled. Maybe it thought it was being overworked. There was just a 20% chance of the same thing happening in my good eye, the left eye, and I never expected it to happen twice. I had no pre-existing condition that made me a candidate for it in the first place. But that second eye has a blurred tiny crescent moon area. So now, what was my good eye is now my bad eye, and vice versa. I didn't see that coming. Although I lost my independence, my ability to drive, and the ability to do many things that I took for granted, my condition is considered an impairment rather than a disability. Not sure who decides on that classification. It's obviously somebody without this impairment. Robert: I'm Robert, a former high school math teacher, now enrolled in the Seeing Eye Guy certification program. I even have a business card for proof of that. I never expected to be a caregiver so soon after my early retirement due to how COVID had changed teaching. We both enjoy travel, and now I have suddenly started noticing things that I never really paid attention to before. Like finding escalators and elevators, looking for trip hazards, and such. Theresa: Likewise. The idea of this podcast started spinning in our

Trailer

Robert and Theresa — Thu, 11 Jul 2024 01:00:32 +0000

We are in the process of producing Living the Could Life, a podcast for travelers whose wanderlust doesn't let disabilities get in the way. Keep your eyes posted for our official launch date.